


I Look At You, And I'm Home

by qiaolians



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, Gen, Memory Loss, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-25
Updated: 2016-11-13
Packaged: 2018-05-23 04:58:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 22,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6105664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/qiaolians/pseuds/qiaolians
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After being away of his home city for nearly 20 years, Phil Coulson decides to come back to visit his mom at his parent’s house.<br/>One day, walking around the city, he sees and old friend (and maybe former girlfriend) from high school that he didn’t see since he decided to leave. When Phil decides to talk to her to see if maybe there’s still something else between them, he’s shocked to learn that Melinda can’t even remember who he is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Arrival

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is a new fic I'm working on and I got stuck at some point so I decided to post it here to see if I could get some feedback and maybe get an inspiration to continue it! Hope you guys enjoy it. (:

“Are we there yet?”

“My answer is the same from 5 minutes ago, Skye.”

There might be about 4 hours since Phil Coulson and his daughter Skye ~~Daisy~~ Coulson had been on the road.

At first, she seemed rather happy to be going to her dad’s old city, getting to know more about his past and spending more time with him since she was going to college in the next year. The situation changed though after 2 hours on a completely desert road that had no reception on her phone what so ever.

“Ugh, dad!”

“Hey, it’s not my fault… you were the one that wanted to come with me, remember?” Phil said, poking his daughter just for fun.

She pretended it annoyed her but deep down, both of them knew she liked it. “Yeah, I know, but you didn’t tell me you were born in the middle of nowhere.” She laughed as she teased him. “I’m just kidding, old man… I think deep down I’m just curious to get there soon.”

“Me too.” Phil said with sigh. He kept trying to remember how everything was when he left the city. He kept thinking if the football field on his high school building was still the same. He kept trying to remember him and his friends playing baseball every afternoon until his mom would call him back home. He had good memories about the city. Mostly good memories.

“Why did you move out of there?” He was suddenly taken out of his thought by his daughter’s question.

“Huh?”

“Why did you leave, dad? I don’t think you or grandma ever told me.”

Phil thought a little about her question before attempting to reply. “I don’t know... I guess life got in the way.”

Skye shot him a glance he knew well. She hated when he gave her these vague answers. Most of the time, he was hiding something when he acted like that. “Come on… Give me a real answer.”

“This is my real answer. Life got in the way.” He looked at her this time, to see if she would accept it. She wouldn’t. “Okay! I didn’t know in what I would major in college, I just couldn’t decide at that time, so a friend of my dad’s who worked on a museum and as a teacher in a university, asked me if I wouldn’t be interested on moving there to maybe pursue a career, since I was always interested in the subject when I was in high school… And the rest is history… Pun intended” He blinked one eye at her.

“Hmm, I see… Why did you say you couldn’t decide at the time? You were always a focused man!”

“I don’t know… I really don’t know.” Skye then noticed that her dad’s last response got him quite emotional.

“Does she have a name?”

“What? Who’s _she_?”

“Ah, come on… Do you think I’ll believe that life got in the way of all of that? Dad, I know you… This _life_ you talk about, must be a _she_ …”

“Sometimes I forget how quick you get things…” Phil was failing on hiding his past.

“So, what’s her name?” She asked, jumping on the seat.

“Skye, knock it off, there’s no one.”

“Fine, you are no fun…”

 

It was almost noon when they arrived at the city. Phil noticed that Skye was really happy to get there, he just didn’t know if she was happy they arrived or that she would be able to get out of the car. Maybe both.

“Finally!” She squealed in her seat.

Phil laughed at his daughter. If there was something he could never deny is that Skye was always passionate about things. Since she got into his life, he was never the same man.

“I think we should go grocery shopping before we get to grandma’s house.”

“Right, so we won’t show up empty handed.”

That decided, Phil looked for a store he knew well. He and his friends used to go there all the time for the ice cream they used to sell. Good memories.

They got to the store and as always, Skye tricked her dad on getting much more stuff than they actually needed. “What if grandma doesn’t have any candy? I’ll go nuts, dad.” Phil shot her a glance, but ended up buying all of it. He admitted he had a sweet tooth as well as his daughter.

Heading out, they both had one bag in each arm, which was making it difficult to Phil to get his car keys. “Skye, can you…?” He said, landing one of the bags to her. She struggled a little, but ended up holding all of it.

Phil tucked his hand in the front pocket of his jeans and found the key. “Dad, can you go faster? It’s heavy.” Getting distracted by his daughter, Phil let the keys fall on the street. “Great.” Skye muttered under her breath.

“Hey, it was you that…” He started to reply her as he got up from picking up the keys when he caught sight of someone he thought he knew.

At the other side of the parking lot was a little Asian woman. Hair loose, workout clothes. She was putting two grocery bags in the trunk of her black sports car.

Their eyes caught each other for a brief moment when she was making her way to the drivers seat. Phil smiled at her, hoping she would notice him and remember. Sadly for him, she practically ignored, getting inside of her car and driving out of the parking lot.

“Mel…?” Phil muttered to himself after all happened. Was that woman the girl that was his best friend in high school or was he just imagining things? If it was her, why did she ignored him?

“DAD! It’s really heavy.” Skye shouted.

“What? Oh, yeah… there you go.” He said unlocking the car and letting her slide inside with the bags, putting everything in the backseat. Phil mirrored his daughter’s actions and for a moment he let himself forget about what had just happened.

“What happened to you? You drifted off for a moment.” She said pulling the seatbelt on.

“Uh, nothing.” He said, starting the car and driving off as well. Nothing. That’s what he kept repeating to himself on the way to his mother’s house. Nothing happened. Maybe she didn’t even see him. Maybe it wasn’t even her. That’s what he kept repeating to himself.


	2. The Doubt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for taking quite a while to update. I'll try to get going with this story now. Hope you guys enjoy!

They arrived at Phil’s mom right a few moments after leaving the store’s parking lot. Phil was happy to come back to his old city, the smile on his face when he saw his mother waiting for them on the threshold was always huge.

Julie Coulson was a cute person. That’s how Phil always remembered his mom, cute, warm and lovable. She would always be there for him, with a smile on her face and the arms wide open, just waiting for a hug.

The moment he stopped the car, Skye was already running towards her grandmother to hug her. Phil watched the moment with a grin on his face before joining them.

“Oh my God, I’ve missed you two so much!” Was the first thing Julie said, still hugging them both with all her strength.

“Missed you too, grandma!” Skye replied with her face buried on her grandmother’s neck.

Phil smiled, “Hi, mom!” He gave her a kiss in the cheek. “Missed you too!”

“Let’s get inside… “ Julie said looking at Skye. In just one minute, they were already heading towards the kitchen, letting Phil behind.

“Okay, guess I’ll just grab the luggage myself…” Phil said, heading towards his car.

 

 

It was night already, they had talked, laughed and now they were finishing having dinner. Phil’s mind was still drifting to the moments earlier in the parking lot.

“Dad, did you hear what grandma just said?”

No, obviously not. Phil was never the one to be oblivious to these kind of situations. He always paid full attention to others while they were having conversations. His mother raised him with the thought that if he couldn’t pay attention to others, he was just being selfish and having no manners. That’s why he cursed himself immediately after he heard his daughter’s question.

“Huh? Sorry, I have a headache.”

“Yeah, headache…” Skye mocked him. “Grandma was asking if we would like to go to aunt Louisa’s tomorrow.”

“Your sister have been asking about you, Phil.” Julie complemented what Skye just said.

“Umm, sure. We are here to see all of you.” Phil replied, still trying to get his acts together.

“Great. I miss aunt Louisa!” Skye said, getting off the table and putting her plate in the sink. “I think I’ll call it quits for today… The trip made me tired.” She said with a yawn in the end.

“Sure, sweetie. You bedroom is ready.” Her grandma said giving her a kiss in the temple. “Go get some rest. I’m sure your aunt will want to take you shopping tomorrow.”

Skye smiled to her grandma, gave her a kiss in the cheek and proceeded to her bedroom, stopping just by her dad to give him a goodnight kiss. “Night, dad!”

“Night, angel eyes.”

Julie saw her granddaughter walk out of the kitchen with a grin on her face. She was quite proud of her son for raising such a great kid. Thinking of him, that’s when she noticed that only Phil’s body was present, his mind was elsewhere completely.

“So, what’s the matter, Phil?”

“What? Nothing, mom.”

Julie took a seat next to her son with a concerned look. She pressed her lips together before talking. “I know you… you know?”

Phil just looked at her with tired eyes, there was no way he was getting out of this. If he wanted to lie to himself, good. But he would not lie to his mother.

“You’ve been back in the city for what? Three hours now?” She started.

“Four!” He corrected. Already giving up and confirming his mother’s concerns.

“Ah, four… And there’s something upsetting you already!” It was not a question.

Phil just took a deep breath and got up to start cleaning the dinner table. While he put the things in the sink, Julie waited for his response.

“There’s nothing upsetting me.”

“And why is it that you seem so off?”

He finished putting the things away and seated at his chair again. “Mom, do you remember Mel?”

His mom thought of the name a little before she could reply. “Mel… Mel… Melinda?”

“Yes, Melinda! Melinda May. Do you?”

“Yes, of course. You two were always together in high school. I believe she still lives in the city.”

“Yeah…” _Hm. So it was her!_ She saw him and yet she ignored him.

Julie realized the discomfort on Phil’s face. “Why are you asking about her?”

He thought for a few moments, was it worth to let his mother know about something that could actually be him overreacting?

“I think I saw her today.” He began, and Julie realized what was all about already. “And I think she saw me too.” She took a deep breath before getting up off her seat. “And yet, she completely ignored me.”

Julie couldn’t take the hurt on her son’s face. Maybe Louisa and her were wrong at the time about not letting Phil know what had happened in the small city. She kept telling herself she was just trying not to bother her son’s life after he got through a rough path himself.

The silence started to get uncomfortable. And for a moment Phil wondered if his mom had listened to what he just said.

“Maybe she really didn’t see you. Are you sure it was her?” Julie asked, putting a kettle on the stove that she would use to boil the water for their coffee in the next morning.

“Pretty sure. She still has the same face.” _A beautiful face_ , he made a note to himself. _The face I fell in love with._

Julie took a deep breath before making her way to Phil. She gave him a tight hug, a kiss in the forehead and caressed his cheeks with both hands. “You should talk to your sister tomorrow.”

That was the moment Phil realized he had missed something while he was living his life away. The fact that his mom didn’t even have the heart to tell him what had happened…

“Okay…” Was all he managed to reply.

“I’m going to bed, sweetheart. Sleep well.”

“You too, mom.”

And there Phil stayed for a few more minutes. In the silence of his mother’s kitchen, he kept wondering what might have happened while he was gone.


	3. The Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Little bit of back story... Hope you guys enjoy it! (:

Phil barely got any sleep after his conversation with his mom. He spent the whole night trying to figure out what she meant by “you should talk to your sister tomorrow.”

He knew his mother would never lie to him. However, she would always make sure he wouldn’t suffer unnecessary pains.

The next morning took long to arrive, for him it seemed like an eternity. Phil got up before everybody else and made his way downstairs.

“Maybe if I start breakfast, I’ll get my mind out of it.” He murmured to himself as he got out of the bed.

Phil picked up a habit with his parents when he was younger. His dad used to work a lot, and sometimes wouldn’t make home to the time he was still awake, so breakfast was the most important time of the day.

As his dad would get ready for the day, tying his tie and buttoning his shirt, Julie would wake up Phil and Louisa so they could help with the breakfast. Every day, a few minutes later, the whole family would be eating pancakes and enjoying each other’s company.

Phil’s dad would always leave the house with the promise that in the weekends they could spent time together by working on his dad’s red corvette from the 60’s. Phil always looked forward to it.

As he poured the boiling water in the coffee powder, he caught himself thinking about those moments.

He hoped he could make memories like that with Skye. Just that this time, maybe Skye would only have the father figure to remember.

“Something smells nice…” His mom said entering the kitchen, stealing himself from his thoughts.

He smiled at the sight of his mom. He missed living in the same house as her. “I figured I would start breakfast already.”

“You could have waited for me, I could help.” She said, making her way to her son and hugging him good morning.

“No need. Take a seat, I’ll handle everything.” He said, giving her a fresh mug of coffee. “I’m making pancakes.” He smiled at her.

“Hmm, I’m starting to think you should visit me more often.” She laughed, taking a seat and watching her son take over the kitchen.

Phil laughed at his mom’s statement and proceeded making the food.

“So, how are things in the big city?” His mom started right before taking a sip of her drink.

He knew where she was trying to get, and he thought maybe it would be good to talk about it.

“They are good, very good.” He started to mix the ingredients in a bowl. “Skye is going to college next year which I still can’t believe it.” Julie realized he had a bittersweet look on his face.

“Yes, time has gone by so quickly.” Julie said, resting her chin on her left hand and continuing watching Phil.

Getting the first pancakes ready, he made sure to put it in a plate and handled it to his mom, alongside butter and maple syrup. “Indeed. Looks like it was yesterday that Audrey and I welcomed her.” Suddenly the kitchen got quiet. Phil stopped his actions with the realization of the name. Julie saw the hint of sadness and longing on her son’s face.

“You have been doing a wonderful job with Skye, Phil!” She reached for his hand to comfort him.

“She’s wonderful. I barely do anything.” He looked at his mom now. “Sometimes I think it’s Skye who takes care of me, you know?” He tried to smile. “It’s just that… Sometimes I miss _her_.”

“I know, son. But Audrey would want you to move on. All she would ever want is you and Skye to be happy.” They both smiled at the reminder of Phil’s deceased girlfriend.

She and Phil had met in Portland, she was a cellist and he was meeting the city that night when his friends dragged him over to one of her concerts. He felt something for her since the first time he saw her. He always thought she was the most gracious and sweet person.

They started dating a few months after that night. Phil always thought of proposing to her but he would get so nervous that postponing it would always seem like the better option.

After dating for a year, they moved in together. Well, kind of, considering Audrey was always travelling to play. Maybe that was one of the reasons Phil ended up taking his mind off of the wedding. What was the point if she was already living with him and they were happy like that? Audrey never brought it up, either.

When they reached the two-year anniversary, they started talking about maybe extending the family. _Why not?_ They both thought.

After some failed attempts, Audrey found out she couldn’t get pregnant. Phil supported her for as long as she needed, letting her know they would always have the opportunity of adoption. A couple of months later, they welcomed Skye into their home.

“Do I smell pancakes?” A sleepy teenager walked into the kitchen. With all the nostalgic moment that was going on, Phil had a big smile on his face at the sight of his daughter.

“Morning!” He said, kissing her temple and putting a plate on the table, motioning for her to sit.

“Yumm! Morning!” She said, sitting and already devouring the food. Her grandmother laughed at the situation. Soon, they had fallen into that ritual Phil had lived in his youth.

“At what time do you want to go to your sister?” Julie asked Phil.

“I don’t know… Whenever you guys want.” He smiled. With all the thoughts about his past, he had almost forgotten the doubts on his mind.

“She told me we should go for lunch.” Skye said to them. “We texted last night.” She informed the adults not looking away from her pancakes.

“Okay, then.” Phil said, taking a seat at the table. This time, the plate on his hand was for him, and for the moment, he decided to just enjoy his meal without stressing about the rest of the day.


	4. The Reveal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What happened to Melinda? Find out! (: Hope you guys enjoy!

“Oh my God, look at you!” Louisa practically yelled when she opened her door and stared at Skye. She couldn’t believe her little niece was already old enough to go to college. Skye laughed at her aunt’s reaction and made her way inside.

“Yep, she’s all grown up now, sis.” Phil said, hugging his sister. “Missed you!”

“Missed you too, weirdo.”

“Mom, why didn’t you tell me Skye was this big?” Louisa said, making her way to the living room to meet with her family.

“I kind of wanted to see the look on your face.” Her mother laughed.

“So, where’s Peter?” Phil asked. Peter was Louisa’s husband- ever since they started dating, Phil was quite fond of the guy. Louisa was sure it was because her husband looked pretty much like Captain America, but Phil would never admit that. When they decided to get married, Phil couldn’t be happier.

“Oh, he had to go to work. A friend of him got sick and he got to cover for him.” Peter was a doctor. He went to the army when he was younger, so when his time there was over, he decided to go to med school and specialize in trauma. That way he would still be able to help those who were fighting for a greater good.

“Guess I’ll have to come by another day to catch up with him then.” Phil smirked at her. He tried to hide that he was actually a fan of Peter, but had no success.

 

 

Lunch went pretty quick and soon they found themselves just sitting at the table, sharing old stories.

Skye always liked to hear new stories about her dad’s past, especially because most of them showed how much of a dork Phil was. She loved this about her dad.

“I wonder how dad used to be with the girls he wanted to date…” She provoked and Louisa didn’t wait to answer.

“Total sap!” She said, looking at him and laughing.

“Hey, that’s not true.” They were all laughing now.

“Skye, remind me later to tell you the things he would do.”

Skye looked at her father and laughed. “Ooh, I don’t think I can wait. Tell me.”

“Hey, don’t you dare.” Phil tried to look mad. He didn’t have a clue of what his sister was about to tell them, but he knew that at the end of it, he would be mortified.

“Come on, Loui. Leave your brother alone.” Julie said, getting up to start cleaning the table.

Skye and her aunt were both laughing hard.

“Once, he wanted so much to impress a girl in our school that every day he would bring coffee to her…” Phil stopped laughing by now but Louisa wasn’t looking at him, and just focused on Skye’s laugh.

“What’s bad about it?” Skye asked.

“Well, he did it for a month before she told him she didn’t like coffee at all.” Skye laughed hard at the end of the sentence. Of course her dad would want to impress someone by being gentle and caring. In his defense, the girl hadn’t said anything in the first days, so he just assumed she was liking the gesture.

Phil wasn’t laughing anymore but he smiled, not wanting to turn the moment more awkward since his daughter was having a good time.

Louisa brushed the back of her hand on her eyes, trying to wipe the tears of laughter that had formed. “Do you remember her name, Phil? I can’t remember who was it.”

“Melinda!” He told her in a low tone, not looking at her, just playing with his fork.

Louisa stopped laughing. _What did I do?_ How could she be so careless to bring it up knowing how things ended. Knowing _what_ happened. She was sure her mother was now looking at her and praying that she would not say anything else.

“Melinda… It’s a pretty name.” Skye got up, not realizing the tension between the adults, putting her plate in the sink and joining her grandmother who was now putting the leftovers in tupperwares.

Phil just gave her a shallow smile and exited the table.

 

 

The afternoon came and Skye was seated with Louisa and Julie looking at old family photos. After a few minutes, Louisa noticed Phil was nowhere to be seen and she decided to look for him.

She found him seating at a chair on her backyard with a drink on his hand. She stood on the threshold, leaning on her hip, trying to figure out how to make her brother forgive her.

“You know… You are always welcome here.” She said in an attempt to break the ice. She knew her comments earlier had gotten into him.

He just smiled and nodded his head.

“I’m sorry, Phil…” Louisa said, seating at the chair beside him. “If I had remembered I wouldn’t bring it up.”

“I know.” Was all he said to her, in a smooth voice.

She knew her brother. Phil was not the kind of guy to lose his temper. In fact, it was quite easy to know  how to differ when he was angry and when he was upset. He would never yell when he was upset.

For a few moments, they just stayed there. In silence.

“Do you still see her?” He asked. Louisa didn’t need to ask whom _her_ was.

“Every now and then.” She limited herself.

“How is she?”

Silence. Louisa didn’t know what to say. She was well? No. She really wasn’t. The moments she took to answer her brother had an impact on him.

“Yesterday, when we arrived at the city, Skye and I stopped at that old store we used to get ice cream, to get a few things to mom…” She didn’t say anything, just listened to her brother. “When we were in the parking lot I saw her… She looked right into my eyes and then looked away…”

He didn’t ask any question but Louisa knew she owned him this. “You sure she saw you?”

He nodded.

“It was not on purpose.”

Phil waited for her to elaborate on that. Louisa took a deep breath before continuing.

“A few years ago, we were all at a party at Victoria’s house…” She started and Phil nodded. He remembered who Victoria was. He was pretty sure she wasn’t very fond of him but she managed to be polite every time they talked. “Melinda had been married at the time…”

“With Andrew, I know.”

“Yes… He was not at the party that day, he was working, so she had to leave early to pick him up.” She stopped, wondering if that was the right thing to be talking about it.

“Something happened to him?” Phil asked, realizing how emotional his sister was. He knew that after he left, both women had gotten pretty close, like best friends.

Louisa shook her head no to his question.

“Melinda was driving on the highway when her car collided with another.” At the mention of it Phil could feel his chest tighten. He could feel the angst risen.

“Inside the other car was a mother and a daughter. Melinda was the only one who survived.” Louisa choked out the last words. And at the sign of it, Phil was already at her side, hugging her close. “She barely made it out alive, Phil. And when she woke up and realized the situation, she kept blaming herself.”

He hugged his sister as hard as he could, trying to comfort her and seek comfort for himself. How could he not know about this? How could they not tell him? Phil had a million questions right now, but he decided this was about Melinda.

“Was she? I mean, was she the one to be blamed for?” He could feel his voice tremble as he spoke.

Louisa shook her head no. “When the paramedics and the police got there they saw that it was Eva’s car, the mother, that had crossed the road in the direction of Melinda’s. After quite some time they found out she had mental problems, she shouldn’t even be driving, let alone with her daughter on the car.”

“And why didn’t Melinda believed it?”

“I don’t know, she woke up… different. The doctors said she had hit her head pretty hard in the collision and because of that some of her memories became quite foggy, but… She wasn’t herself anymore.” Phil had to hold his breath at that comment. Had she completely forgotten about him? About them? “She and Andrew were trying to have a baby at that time… When she found out that a little girl died in the accident, she got worse. Suddenly her world fell apart. She lost herself that day.”

Phil couldn’t imagine the pain they had endured at that time. He was having a hard time himself processing all of the information.

“Are they still married?” He couldn’t help to ask, he wanted Melinda to be happy.

“No, they ended up getting a divorce a few months after. Andrew moved away, although he still checks on her once in a while.”

Of course. He knew Andrew was not a bad guy, he loved Melinda. But he also knew that when Melinda would set her mind into something, very few people could make her change. He was sure no accident could’ve changed that. And this he didn’t need to ask his sister. _Why had it ended?_ He knew Melinda, and maybe, just maybe, he would be able to help this time. That’s what he hoped for.


	5. The Sorrow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little bit shorter but it starts with a flashback so I guess I'm forgiven? haha (:

_“Would you stop?” Phil said with a grin on his face, trying to cover his eyes with his hands._

_“Phil, YOU stop. Let me take a decent picture!” Melinda said, pointing her camera towards him._

_“What would I win if I let you?” He asked with a smirk._

_She smiled at him, and decided to take advantage of his now uncovered face and snapped a quick pic. As soon as she did it, a pair of strong hands pulled her towards him. One hand went to brush her cheek, putting a lock of hair behind her ear and the other was hooked on her waist. “Careful with my camera.” She said trying to keep it far from the embrace._

_“Yeah, yeah, I know…” Phil said with his mouth already close to hers. Soon, he closed the gap between them. At first, Melinda was smiling into the kiss, enjoying the warmth of Phil’s body against hers. After a few seconds, both of them engaged in a deep and passionate kiss._

“Dad…? Dad…?”

“Huh?” He turned back to his daughter, wondering for how long she was there calling for him.

“Oh my God, what is it with you and this place?” She asked annoyed.

“Excuse me?”

“Since we got here I’ve seen you do this many times… You get lost in your thoughts and forget about what’s around you.” Skye said, seating in the couch next to her father, snuggling close to him.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered to her, giving a kiss on her temple.

“It’s okay.” She smiled. “So, since it’s raining outside, should we settle for a movie?” She asked her dad, full of hope.

That was kind of their thing, they loved to spend time like this with each other. Always buying new movies to watch together, always making marathons of their favorite franchises. Skye loved that they had this strong bonding.

“Sure!” He sounded less excited than he wanted to.

“If you don’t feel like it, that’s okay, Dad!”

“No, no, no. Let’s do it.” He said, getting up the couch and turning the TV on. “So, you wanna choose it?”

“Okay!”

 

 They watched films the whole day until at some point, Skye fell asleep on Phil. He made sure she was comfortable enough before he got up, turned the TV off and went to the kitchen were his mom was starting dinner.

“Hey, mom. Need any help?” He said, taking a seat on the table.

“Not at all, Phil. Since you arrived you’ve been doing everything around here.” Julie said, opening the cabinets and dragging things out so she could start cooking.

“It’s no problem to help you.”

“I know, but every day I wake up and you already have the breakfast ready.” She smiled at him. “Let me handle this.”

“Okay.” They sat quiet for a few minutes before Phil would speak again.

“So, I talked to Louisa yesterday. She told me what happened.”

Julie didn’t need to ask him what he was talking about. She knew that since Phil arrived, there was only one thing bothering him. Only one person.

“We didn’t tell you at the time because we were trying to protect you, son.” Julia said in a smooth, reassuring tone.

“I know…” Phil said, eyes on the table. “I don’t agree. But I understand.”

Julia gave him a sad smile. She was somehow relieved about it.

“What do you think I should do about it?”

“Phil…”

“I mean, I should talk to her…”

“Phil, I don’t think…”

“She must be really lost, alone…”

“Phil!” He finally looked at his mom. “Are you sure it’s the best way?” The question hung around them for a moment. “For the both of you… Do you think this is a good idea?”

“Why wouldn’t it be?”

“You both went through traumas. You both are different than you were in high school.”

Phil didn’t have words for his mom anymore. He knew she was right, but in his heart, he still had so much to do for Melinda.

“I just…” His voice was lower than he intended. “I just feel like I should have been there for her.”

Julie took a deep breath and walked towards her son. “Don’t blame yourself, Phil!” She put a hand on his shoulder.

“I’m the one who went away, mom.” He whispered.

They hugged for a while. All Julie could do for her son was show that she was there for him. She never asked real questions about what happened between him and Melinda, she never forced him. All she could do was reassure him that she would be there for him, no matter what. And Phil felt that.

 

Later that night, Phil sat on his bed thinking about his memory earlier. They were so happy, so full of life.

He got up from his bed and walked to the closed that used to be his when he lived at the house. There, in a few boxes, he found his old soccer uniform, old books from his history classes, even an old pair of sneakers that he worn until he couldn’t anymore. His favorites of when he was a little boy, he never let his mom throw it away. He smiled at the thought that until today, she respected his wishes and kept the old thing.

Finally, he found what he was looking for. An envelope that had turned yellow already from the amount of time it was kept there. Taking a deep breath, his fingers flicked through it, bringing out a photo of him. A black and white in which he had a soft smile on his face. He never liked having portraits of himself, but this one he made sure he kept it safe.

Turning the photo on its back, his heart pounded on his chest when he read the words written on a beautiful handwriting.

_My favorite dork,_

_Yours, Melinda._


	6. The Talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seems like things are about to change... 
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy (:

It had been almost ten days that Phil was in the city and he had seen no sign of Melinda anywhere. He came back to the store a few times- if Julie said that they had run out of anything, Phil was always glad to get into his car and drive to the place in a hope of finding more than groceries. Still, no success.

To be honest, he still didn’t know if it was a good idea to go after Melinda. The words his mother’s said to him in the kitchen a few days back still reverberated in his mind. _Are you sure it’s a good idea? For both of you?_

Even though his mom and his sister had said to him things were different, he couldn’t picture the _new Melinda_ in his mind. He only saw the girl he fell in love all those years back. That girl that could be sweet and fierce at the same time. The girl who used to drive a motorcycle to the school but at the same time liked to lay on the grass and look at the sky.

He smiled at that memory, both of them at the park, laying on the ground and enjoying the silence. He had to admit he wasn’t very fond of just sitting quiet when he had such a perfect girl by his side, but as the time went by, Melinda had taught Phil how to enjoy the silence, how to just feel the energy that ran between two bodies even though they weren’t even touching. Melinda taught Phil how to be in peace.

Entering the living room, he saw the three women of his life chatting.

“Look who’s decided to join his family for the day…” His sister announced when she saw him.

“Very funny.” He said, kissing his mom on the cheek and making his way towards Skye.

“What happened, dad? You never sleep so much…”

“I don’t know, was just tired…”

“You are definitely not the same when you are around here.” Skye said, laughing at how different her dad had presented himself in the past few days. She was happy to get to know this new side of him but sometimes she noticed he got a sad vibe. Almost like regret followed him around and he didn’t know how to handle it.

“So, what are your plans for the day?” Louisa said, getting up to put her coat on. “It’s a beautiful day outside.”

“I don’t know, what do you wanna do?” Phil asked Skye.

“I chose yesterday. Today is your day.”

Yesterday they had gone to the movies with everyone and then had a nice dinner in a new restaurant. Life was pretty good for Skye, she was getting more spoiled than ever now that her free days, as she would put it, were on a countdown.

“Okay, how do you guys feel about going to the park?” Phil tried to shake the memory off, but decided to give in.

“I’m out.” His sister replied, “I have to pick Peter up at the house and then we are going shopping. Mom, why don’t you go with them?”

“Oh, darling, I’m sorry but today I think it will be just the two of you.”

“What? Are you guys tired of us already?” Skye asking in a mocking tone, pretending she was hurt.

“Not at all, sweetie. But not all of us are on vacation.” Her grandmother replied to her, giving a kiss on her forehead and making her way upstairs.

Louisa left as well, kissing them goodbye. Soon, Phil and Skye were left alone in the couch.

“I think it’s just us, then…” Skye said to her dad.

“Yep, you are going to make an effort to go out with your old man?” Phil said, poking her.

“Old man? Pff… Dad, you are a handsome man.”

Phil laughed at his daughter. “Well, thank you.”

“In fact, I think it’s time for you to find a gorgeous lady…” She wiggled her eyebrows at him.

They had talked about it a few times. Skye wanted her dad to be happy. After her mom died, they had lived for each other and she didn’t mind having her dad with her always, but now she was about to leave for college and she worried about him being alone. He deserved someone good, someone who would see the great guy he is.

“Come on… Let’s change.” Phil got up the couch, deciding not to engage in the _you-should-get-a-date_ talk with his daughter again. Phil knew that his heart had chosen someone already.

 

They got to the park and soon they found a place in the grass to seat down and just enjoy the day.

A few minutes went by, Skye was talking about her hopes for her new life, Phil had lectured her a few times about going too wild and not paying attention to classes or assignments.

“Do you know what you are going to do when we get back?” Skye asked after a few minutes of silence.

“What do you mean?”

“Dad, I’m not dumb.” She said a little bit annoyed. “Uncle Nick told me you quit.”

Phi closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He hadn’t done it out of a irresponsible act. He put some thought into it and decided it would be good to take some time off for himself. After teaching in a university for almost twenty years, maybe it was time for a change.

“I’m sorry I didn’t say anything…” He looked to the ground. “I didn’t want to…”

“To worry me, I know.” She said looking at his face. “Are you unhappy?”

“No…”

“Dad!”

“I don’t know… I just…” He looked at her know. Phil had no problem at letting his daughter see his vulnerabilities, but this was hard. “I just think I should change a little bit, maybe try to go after some dreams long forgotten. And I feel like now’s the time.”

“I think you are right!”

“You do?” He felt his heart getting warmer.

She nodded. “You should go after your happiness, you deserve it. And now that I won’t be around to cheer you up, you have to do it for yourself.” She couldn’t help but provoke him.

They both laughed at that, agreeing that Phil should go after what was best for him. In the back of his mind, Phil realized his daughter had just sorted out his doubts about the future without even knowing the real reason why he had been so different.

In a moment that had seem to be a trick of destiny, Phil looked past his daughter and saw a small figure with a large camera in hand.

Melinda was shooting some people laying in the grass. She had been just capturing little moments of the people who seemed to be enjoying the afternoon.

Phil saw the moment she snapped a picture and thanked a couple. Looking at the visor to check if the shot came out alright, she smiled. Phil knew that smile, it was always the confirmation that she had liked something so much that she couldn’t help it.

He smiled at that. This was the confirmation he needed for his new life. This was the incentive he needed to forget his doubts and maybe just focus on his feelings.

Maybe things could change, and change for better.


	7. The Surprise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shorter chapter... *whispers* sorry
> 
> Did I mention this fic was angst? well... haha enjoy (:

His heart was racing now. He had spent days trying to meet up with her and suddenly she appears out of nowhere?! _Thanks a lot, God._

Melinda was making her way to every group of people she could and asking them if she could take a picture.

Phil was suddenly in shock about it. At that day in the parking lot he only had a glimpse of her, but now, now he was able to see all of her. Now he could see how her hair was flowing with the wind that hit it every few seconds. Now he could see a few lines on her face that weren’t there the last time they saw each other. _Doesn’t matter, she looks more beautiful than ever._

He was now admiring her hands, a part of her body he always liked. Melinda had strong beautiful hands. It amazed him how badass she could be in the fight classes she took and still have so smooth, beautiful hands. He watched intently when her index finger would press the button and snap the picture.

He was so lost in the sensations of seeing her whole for the first time in years that he didn’t realize when she approached.

“Hi, I’m sorry to interrupt…” She began. He voice as smooth as he remembered.

“Not at all.” Skye replied for him. He wasn’t in his right mind at the moment.

“I’m a photographer.” She said, handling Skye her business card. “I’m doing a project about _love_ …”

“Melinda May…” Skye read in a low tone. _Wait, Melinda… Was it…?_ In the few seconds she took to realize whom this woman might be, Skye looked at her dad for confirmation and got more than this.

Phil looked completely shocked about the woman standing in front of them. He was trying to cover it, trying to act cool about it but Skye knew he was nervous.

“I was wondering, can I take a picture of you and your...?” Melinda continued, not seeming to realize the affect she had on them.

“Dad. He’s my dad.” Skye replied, trying to stress the word dad as if trying to call Phil back to reality.

“Great, I think you guys are the first father and daughter of my day… So, can I?” She motioned to her camera.

“Sure, right _dad_?”

“Oh, uh… Yeah, sure…” Phil seemed to have snapped out of his previous state.

They scooped closer and Phil hugged Skye. After a few shots, Melinda looked pleased about the result.

Phil didn’t know what to do. She was so close, she was so beautiful, and still, she had just treated them like completely strangers. He didn’t know what to do. His heart was divided between profound sadness and utter joy. Skye realized what was going on as well, and Phil knew his daughter was sharing his feelings.

Melinda thanked them both and walked away, probably looking for more people to join her project.

Phil just watched everything with wide eyes. His heart beating faster as Melinda got far.

“What are you doing? Isn’t she _the_ Melinda?”

“You do realize that there might be more Melindas in this city, don’t you?”

“Really dad? As if your face when you saw her didn’t give you away… And this city is nothing near big, so I’m not sure about how many Melindas are here…” Skye was annoyed with her dad now. How could he let this moment slip away? “Go after her…”

“No!” His reply came faster than she thought.

“Why not?”

“She doesn’t know who I am.”

It hurt to say those words out loud. It was the first time Phil had acknowledge what his sister had told him. It was the first time he allowed himself to grieve his old friend in some way.

After Louisa told him what happened, he remembered the night in the parking lot and practically lived on the hope that Melinda hadn’t really seen him. That she hadn’t paid attention and because of that, didn’t talk to him. But now, she spoke to them, she introduced (re-introduced, in fact) herself to them like they were just strangers that would help her with her job.

She looked at Phil through the view finder of her camera for several minutes and didn’t even flinch.

Melinda May didn’t remember him. Or that’s what he thought…


	8. The Secret Promise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updating sooner this time... I think?
> 
> Enjoy (:

The drive back home was one of the quietest Skye has ever been. When she woke up today she couldn’t imagine what was going to happen. What were the chances that her dad would finally see his old girlfriend from high school on a park? Worst of all, what were the chances that the said girlfriend would not even remember him? She felt truly helpless.

Phil drove with his mind full and at the same time, he couldn’t think of anything. Did Melinda not recognize him at all? Why was he so sad about it? Louisa had explained everything, it wasn’t fair to Melinda to have her remember him. It wasn’t fair to him to keep punishing himself for that.

When they arrived back home, Phil got out of the car without a word and made his way upstairs, mumbling something about a headache along the way when his mom asked if something had happened.

 

 

“What’s got into him?” Louisa asked when Skye took a seat at the kitchen table, watching her grandmother prepare dinner.

“I don’t really know…” Skye said looking at her hands, trying to figure it out herself.

“What do you mean, sweetie?” Julie asked while stirring something in the pan.

Skye took a deep breath trying to decide if it was a good idea to carry on with the subject.

“We saw someone at the park…” She started, not sure where she was going with it. “Actually, she approached us, a photographer, she said she was shooting for a project about love and…”

“And…?” Louisa was curious now, by the start of it she kind of knew where this was heading to.

“And, when dad saw her he just froze in place… Then she handled me her business card. It read Melinda May.” Skye practically mumbled the last words. Deep down, she didn’t want to get the confirmation that someone she knew that had been important to her dad, hadn’t remembered him.

She saw the look her aunt and grandmother gave each other.

“After she left I asked dad if it was _the_ Melinda, you know, the one you mocked him about it that day?” she said to her aunt. Louisa gave her a nod. “He didn’t confirm with words, but kinda gave it away it his attitude.”

“And what did he do?” Louisa asked, she was somewhat nervous about it. Her hands were all sweaty. When she got the news that her older brother was getting back to town, she knew that this had to happen at some time. She just wished it was under different circumstances.

 “I told him to go after her, but he only said she didn’t remember him.” She finished with a sadness in her tone as well.

“Look, Skye… it’s complicated.” Her grandmother said, taking a seat beside her.

Skye knew something was up, and she decided she was ready to know about it if it meant she would be able to help her father. Listening to what her grandmother and aunt started to tell her, she was already thinking how she would be able to help.

 

 

“Shit…” Phil mumbled to himself while exiting his bathroom after getting out of his shower. “You know, this was not okay when we were teenagers and is definitely not okay now that we are adults?”

“Oh, come on… At least you are not naked this time.” Louisa pointed to his shorts.

“Very funny. Why are you in my room?” Phil asked while picking a shirt on his drawers.

“I want to talk.”

Phil didn’t say anything, he really wasn’t in the mood.

“Skye said you guys went to the park today…?”

“Just ask what you came here to ask.” He said making his way inside his bathroom again. This time, coming back without his wet towel.

“You saw Melinda there.” It wasn’t a question.

He looked at his sister. There was no way he was getting out of this conversation.

To him, it felt kind of humiliating not having Melinda remember who he was. That night, when Louisa told him about the accident, both of them wondered if she would remember him when they met. Both of them hoped she would remember.

Seating beside his sister on his bed, Phil let out a sigh.

“Yes. And this time she definitely saw me.”

“Skye told me.”

“Yeah… I guess there is no doubt anymore.”

Louisa leaned into him. He put his arm around her and they just stayed there for a while, enjoying each other’s warmth.

While they were growing up, their mother would always make sure to teach them that when someone was upset, a hug was always the start to feeling better again. So that’s what they always did. They hugged and just enjoyed that silent acknowledgement that things would get better. Like a secret promise.

“You know, the high school reunion is next week.” Louisa said with a hint of suggestion on her tone.

“Yes, I heard…”

“Maybe you could try again…”

“What? No…”

“Why not, Phil?” She made sure to look into his eyes now. “I’m sure she is going to be there, and then you guys can talk… Really talk.”

“No, I can’t do this…” Phil said, getting up and standing beside his window. When he was a kid, he would always stare into the lights in the street.

“After she recovered, she didn’t remember me as well. It took some time until she remembered who I was… And I’m sure it was like that with many people.” She tried to reassure her brother. Deep down she knew it wasn’t enough. Most of the people Melinda had forgotten were people she would only see once in a while, but Phil… Phil she had a relationship with. Phil was her best friend. Deep down, Louisa was curious and upset for her brother for having to live this moment. But just like her niece, if she could have a way of helping to make him feel better, she would take it.

“I don’t know if I can take it if she doesn’t remember me again.” He confessed.

Louisa got up and made her way to her brother, embracing him on a hug one more time.

“You just have to be the boy who didn’t give up when she said she didn’t like coffee.” She whispered to him.

Phil actually smiled at that. He remembered the day like it was yesterday. He had been buying her coffee for an entire month before he found out she didn’t like it at all. He was crushed, feeling like an idiot for not even asking her before he started his daily gentleness.

He felt like giving up trying to have Melinda actually like him, how could she not think he was a completely and pretentious jackass after all of this?! After apologizing to her and promising her would not bother her again, he was surprised when she just smiled at him and said “That’s okay. If you want to try again tomorrow… I love black tea with lemon.” And then, she was gone, leaving teenager Phil with a grin on his face. Melinda had given him hope. She had taught him not to give up on her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoiler Alert: I know you guys want to see Melinda in the story, and I know I've taken some time to do it, so I'm here to tell that you'll be getting at least a little bit of her POV in the next chapter. 
> 
> After that, I promise she will be a recurring character. Thanks for sticking with it.


	9. The Boy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally some Melinda! (:
> 
> Hope you enjoy.

It had been a hell of a crazy week for Melinda. She tried to remember when was the last time that she felt so happy about working on something. Seating at her apartment late at night, she could only think of her dad.

 _You have to do more of what makes you happy, Mellie…_ He kept saying to her after her accident.

Since her divorce, Melinda kept trying to re-invent herself. The life she knew and the life she wanted suddenly didn’t make sense anymore, she had to learn how to be happy again.

She tried several things since the accident, things that had gone from painting to returning to martial arts, and even maybe a little bit of ice-skating. Unfortunately, her body didn’t respond to her movements the way it did before, so she only kept getting more and more frustrated.

One day, after wandering around her apartment trying to think about what she should do with her life, she stumbled in one of the boxes she still hadn’t managed to work on since moving out of the house she shared with Andrew.

Reaching inside, Melinda found her old photography equipment and decided to give it a try. Photography was the only thing that allowed herself to go other places, to visit other memories that didn’t make her feel like her life should have ended _that_ night.

 

 

Melinda was seated at the small office she had put together in her apartment trying to sort the photographs she would use on her project. Scrolling through all of them, she was quite happy that she was still good at it. Finally something that gave her joy.

While she began to separate the files into folders, her cell rang. Melinda took a deep breath before she began looking for the device. She always hated being bothered while working.

Looking at the screen, she felt a little bit guilty about cursing the person that would be keeping her from diving into her relaxing time.

“You sure have a timing…” She replied to the person on the other end.

“Oh, Mel… Sorry, am I interrupting something?” Victoria asked quite out of breath.

“What are you doing?” Melinda asked, taking a seat in front of her computer again.

“I’m on the treadmill… It’s the only time I have free to talk to you.”

“So, not only are you interrupting me but yourself as well?” Melinda asked with a smirk on her face.

“You know me. I multitask!”

“Well, I don’t!” Melinda replied, hoping that her friend would pick on the hint and go straight to the point.

“’Kay, got it. I’m just calling to ask if you are going to the reunion?”

Melinda had put her phone on speaker now to actually try to multitask, looking intently at her computer screen.

“What reunion?”

“The High School reunion… You know, high school? That place we used to go just to make out with the pretty people and eat some good lunch?”

At hearing what the subject was really about, Melinda flinched. She hated to go down memory lane, mostly because she simply could not remember half of the people she once knew, mostly because after her accident, everyone who encountered her looked like they were pitying her. And for that, she had zero patience.

“You know only _you_ did that, right?”

“Whatever. You are just trying to fool me.”

“I’m working, Victoria.” She was indeed trying to work, but it had nothing to do to the fact that she was not wanting to even respond to a simple question.

“Melinda, please.”

“Hand, I can’t go.”

“Why not?”

Melinda took a deep breath that Victoria was able to hear at the other end of the line. _Because I don’t want to. Because everyone will be looking at me. Because I just wish I had died instead of having to wake up every day with this weight on my shoulders._

“Hey, don’t go there!” Her friend called, knowing what Melinda was doing to herself. “What happened, happened. You deserve to live your life. And I would like to have you there with me.”

At this moment, Melinda opened one particular photo. She remembered them, father and daughter. She started looking intently at the photo.

The girl had a big smile on her face, the guy, however, seemed a little lost. He tried his best to look happy though, but couldn’t match the girl’s smile.

Tracing the lines on his face, Melinda could feel something familiar building inside her. Her eyes began to go from his jawline to his eyes. Beautiful blue eyes, thin lips... it looked like he had lost a lot of his hair from when he was younger but somehow it didn’t diminished his beauty not even a little. Melinda was fascinated by the stranger on her screen.

“Hello… are you there? I can’t believe you are not paying attention to me, Melinda” Her eyes went from the screen of her computer to the screen of her cell on the table. She had heard Victoria say that many times, but suddenly her mind went somewhere else.

Her eyes went to the screen again.

_“Melinda? I can’t believe you’re not paying attention to what I was saying.” Victoria said to her when she looked up from her backpack. Melinda was not even paying attention to the story Victoria had been telling her five seconds ago. Instead, Melinda was looking to a particular boy playing with a basketball on the court, and the boy was looking back at her, somehow she always got lost on those beautiful blue eyes._

“Melindaaa??” Victoria practically screamed on the other side of the line, forcing Melinda to snap out of her memories.

What had just happened? She hadn’t had one of those trigger-moments for so long.

“Umm, Vic. I’ll call you back.”

“No, wait. Promise me you will go!” She tried one last time to convince her friend.

“Okay, whatever. Talk later.” She clicked on the screen, ending the call.

Looking back to her computer, she tried to revive her memories with no success. It was always like that, she would have a moment that would cause her to be completely overwhelmed and nothing more after that. She would be left alone with only her thoughts, wondering if it was a memory or a wish.

But why she had this moment now, right when she was looking at the strangers photo? What had the boy from her youth anything to do with the stranger on her screen?


	10. The Confront

So, the day was here and Phil felt his hands sweating. Looking in the mirror to adjust his shirt, he saw the boy who used to get nervous when he was about to take the girl of his dreams out on a date.

Taking a deep breath, he grabbed his wallet and car keys out of the table he used to do his homework when younger and bolted out of the house to pick his sister up.

The drive was smooth and Phil was trying not to think about the real reason he was doing this. _Maybe she won’t even be there. It’s going to be good just to see the people from the old times._

“Would you just relax?” Louisa said on his side, not looking at him.

“Huh?”

“Phil, I can feel your tension right from here. Seriously, you are going to crash this way… I’m too young to die.”

Phil looked at his hands on the wheel and realized he might have been too tense while driving. His knuckles were turning white and this was a sign he should try to relax a little.

 

They arrived at the gymnasium and Phil was taken back immediately to the years he used to spend there. A few of bad memories aside, he had been really happy on his high school years.

Between playing on the basketball team and going to classes, Phil was considered one of the top students of his time.

Looking at the crowd, he realized most of the faces were familiar, none too familiar, though. The chance of messing up names was real.

“Oh, look… There’s Stephanie.” Louisa pointed to the other side of the room to a lady wearing a purple dress. Phil wasn’t sure he remembered her. “You know who she is… Used to be a cheerleader? Got caught cheating on her boyfriend with a player of your team?” She whispered to him.

Phil laughed at his sister. Not even ten minutes that they arrived and she was already having fun, gossiping about peoples lives.

“Come on, Phil… Live a little. Everyone here is talking about each other lives.”

“I bet…” he chuckled, turning to grab a drink.

“Oh, Monica! There’s Monica… I’ll be right back.” Louisa said already making her way to her friend. Phil wasn’t sure who this Monica was either, but his sister apparently knew everybody.

“Wait, Louisa…” He tried to grab her hand so she wouldn’t leave him alone. No success.

Phil sighed, looking around him, trying to recognize anybody… It was sad to be there just because of Melinda, but it was worse to be there alone, just waiting for his luck.

“Phil Coulson…?” He heard a familiar voice from behind him. Phil turned around, not sure if he was ready to talk with the person.

“Victoria!” He said, kissing her cheek.

She kissed him back. “I wasn’t expecting you here. It’s been a long time.”

“Well, yeah…” He said, looking at his drink on his hand with a shy smile. “Louisa practically dragged me, so…”

Since he left the city in his early years, Phil had come back only a few times, on special occasions and was rarely seen by any of his former colleagues. To him, it was better that way.

“Hey, I like the new hair…” He pointed at her red flash lights.

“Thanks!” She smiled at him, reaching for a drink for herself. “So, what brings you back?”

Victoria always kind of scared Phil. She somehow had a predatory look on her face, not to mention she was very protective of one of her best friends, Melinda. So, Phil always had the impression she wasn’t very fond of him and to have her now, standing in front of him making small talk, was kind of alarming.

“Oh, I don’t know. Kinda missed here. Decided it was maybe time to be back for a while.”

“A while? So you are planning to stay?” She asked in a low tone. It was a little bit imperative, but Phil decided to ignore.

“Hmm, maybe… Haven’t put too much thought into it.” He said, not looking at her. Instead, he was analyzing the people around.

Victoria gave a light chuckle and looked around as well. “Have you talked to anybody yet?”. Fishing, Victoria Hand was fishing with him, he realized.

“Umm, no. I can’t seem to remember anybody here. Are you sure we went to school with all of these people?” _Nice, Coulson._

Victoria laughed, an actual laugh. “Yeah, I’m sure. I invited all of them, I should know.”

“Is that it?”

She nodded. “I’m the principal here now. So it’s my job to take care of the actual and former students.”

“Wow, that’s amazing. Congrats!” Phil was actually impressed. In the back of his mind, he was sure Victoria would have a powerful position.

“Thank you.” She said, still analyzing him. “You are aware that I know why you are really here, right?”

“Ah, so the small talk is over?” He asked, laughing at her. “I was beginning to wonder for how long you would put up with it.”

“She’s better off without you, Coulson!”

“Is she?” He stared at her now.

“Yes! She doesn’t need you coming back to her life and leaving again.”

“Who says I’m planning to do that?” He pushed. Not leaving her eyes for one second.

When Victoria was about to reply, he saw her eyes wandering to the entrance and widening.

Phil followed her line of vision and saw Melinda entering the room. She was beautiful, blue jeans, plain black t-shirt with a brown leather jacket, long hair flowing around.

They watched as Melinda gave a shy smile to someone in the back of the room and made her way to say hello.

Victoria looked at Phil again, realizing that the woman who had just chosen the perfect moment to arrive had stun him.

“Many things happened since you left…” She started, trying to hide from the people in the room the harsh tone she was using.

“I know what happened.” Phil was trying to keep a steady breath.

“Good. So you know you weren’t here to pick up the pieces of the mess you left behind.” She took a deep breath to try and lower her tone. “Look, I don’t know you- ”

“You are right, you don’t.”

“But I know you hurt her when you left. She might not remember you now, but she will eventually… And if you hurt her again- ” It was sounding like a threat to him. Victoria Hand, his former high school colleague, was threatening him.

“I won’t hurt her, Victoria…” he tried to reassure her. “It was never my intention… It was John who -”

“I don’t wanna hear your excuses, Coulson. I don’t care what you and Garret did at the time.” She put her drink on a table near them. “I’m just… asking you, don’t hurt her again.” She made sure to punctuate every word.

Phil only nodded, looking at the drink in his hand.

“She doesn’t deserve it.” She said, before leaving.

Phil just stood there alone once more. This night had taken a turn he wasn’t expecting in a million years.

Maybe it was better to follow Hand’s advice (that had indeed sounded more like a threat). Maybe Melinda was better off without him. Who was he kidding? There was no way he could make things better now. Victoria was right, eventually Melinda was going to remember the past and then, how would he explain to her why he had hurt her?

 _“Do you really think she’s the right woman for you, Phil? Huh? Come on…”_   He heard Garret’s words ringing on his head again.

Putting his drink near Victoria’s on the table, Phil glanced at Melinda one more time before heading to the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I suppose I should apologise now? haha
> 
> Thanks for reading... It might take a little longer for the next update since the next days will be kinda crazy to me, but I promise if things change, I'll update as soon as possible.


	11. The Decision

“Hey, were are you going?” Louisa caught up with him at the door.

Louisa had watched the interaction between Victoria and Phil in the last minutes. She saw the vicious face Victoria had while saying something to Phil before she put her drink on the table and left. She saw the look on her brother’s face when he was left alone.

When he made his way to the door, she run for him.

“I’m leaving, Louisa.” Phil started to walk again.

“No you are not.” She caught his arm. “Phil, _she_ ’s right there…”

“It doesn’t matter. This is a waste of time.”

“Why? Because Hand just got your head full? Huh?” She had a harsh tone now. But it was needed if she was going to prove her point to her brother. “Hey, listen to me.” She got a hold of his arm and pushed him to a corner.

“Hand is right, Melinda is better off without me.” Phil muttered.

“Shut up! No, she is not. When are you going to stop listening to what people think is better for you and actually do what _you_ think is better for you? Once wasn’t enough?” Phil wasn’t looking at her until now, his eyes widened. _Once wasn’t enough?_ The words kept ringing on his head.

 

At the other side of the gymnasium, Melinda was approaching Victoria.

“Remind me again why I keep coming to your reunions…?” She said, grabbing a drink and standing beside her friend.

“Because deep down you like it. Plus, you are the photographer. I’m your employer!” Victoria nudged her on the side.

“No you are not. I’m my own employer. I only do you favors.”

Victoria chuckled. Yeah, Melinda May was her own boss, there was no way this woman was going to let someone give orders to her now.

“Who was the guy you were talking to?” Melinda asked. Straight to the point.

“Who?” Victoria asked, pretending to be looking for a drink.

“Him.” Melinda pointed to the other side of the room. “The one who seems to be having an argument with Louisa.”

“You know who she is?” Victoria was kind of surprised that Melinda remembered. Usually, when she didn’t see people or places or things for a certain amount of time, she would forget about it. It was a fact that her memory wasn’t the same after the accident.

“Yeah, I’ve seen her at the grocery store a couple of times…”

“What about him?” Victoria decided to test the waters.

Melinda put some thought into it, still watching as the two interacted at the other side.

“I’ve seen him… at the park. With his… daughter. They let me take some photos for a project.” Melinda took a sip of her drink. She was quite pride of herself, usually she didn’t remember people’s relations, but now she did. Yeah, that guy had a daughter, and she had met them.

Victoria was watching her now. “You only saw him at the park?”

Melinda turned, looking at Victoria. She knew how Victoria led conversations. She would never go straight to the point, instead she kept fishing to see if it was safe to keep going.

“What do you want to know, Victoria? Do I know him already?”

Victoria took a deep breath. It wasn’t fair to hide things from Melinda. Besides, she had already warned Coulson.

“He went to high school with us. Phil Coulson, he’s Louisa’s old brother. That’s why he’s here.”

Melinda looked at him again. _Phil Coulson…_ She liked the name. _Phil…_ Suddenly the warm feeling she had when she looked at his picture in her monitor came back.

 

“I’m sorry, Loui. I’m going.” Phil decided he had enough of this.

“Phil…”

“Call me when you want to leave. I will be around, I just can’t stay here.” He said, making his way out.

She took a deep breath and watched him leave.

 

At the other side, Melinda saw as the two finished the conversation, him leaving and her being left with a sad look on her face.

Melinda didn’t know why, but she had an urge to go after him. To check if he was okay.

She saw that instead of making his way to the gates, Phil was going elsewhere, maybe to the football field.

She saw Louisa turning and coming back to the gymnasium, maybe looking for the lady she had been talking before.

“Let it go, Melinda. You have nothing to do with them having a discussion.” Victoria said beside her, having just watched the look on Melinda’s face while watching both at the other side.

“Stop telling me what to do.”

She took a deep breath, left her drink at a near table and made her way out of the gymnasium as well. Melinda stopped at the door, looking to her right was the parking lot, looking to her left, she caught a glimpse of Phil taking a turn, definitely going to the football field.

She looked to the sky. It had a full moon and was filled with stars. _What are you doing, Melinda?_

She took another deep breath, trying to figure it out what was she feeling right now. She tried to focus on her heartbeat.

The accident changed many things for Melinda, it changed many things she thought she knew about herself. She was always a rational being, pondering her options every time to decide what better action to take. Now, seeing herself standing in her old high school, trying to think if she followed her will to go after some random guy because she had seen him upset. What was happening to her?

 _I guess it changed that too…_ She looked at her hands. They were steady, not trembling like they used to be when she had a crisis. That was the confirmation she needed.

She lowered her hands, closed them in tight fists on her side before opening again. She shook them and turned to her left.


	12. The Hope

The night was cold. Phil was seated at the bleachers now, looking as a thin fog remained on the field.

Thinking back, Phil was never really a fan of football. It was too violent and the guys who used to play for the team were complete douchebags. He hated everything about it.

Basketball was a lot safer, a lot more fun.

Lost in his thoughts about the past and what this place brought to him, he failed to notice a small figure approaching. When he noticed, she was already at his side.

“Hi.” She said with a shy smile on her face.

Particularly, Melinda didn’t even know what she was doing.

“Oh, Hi… hi.” Phil said, stunned by the fact that maybe Melinda had followed him, which meant that she had been paying attention to him. _But how…?_

“It’s Phil Coulson, isn’t it?” She asked.

 _Does she know who I am? What’s happening?_ All of the questions that kept popping up on Phil’s mind might have been written all over his face because in a matter of seconds before the first question, Melinda was already justifying herself.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Victoria told me who you are.” She said, and almost failed to notice that the anxious/doubting look on Phil’s face was replaced almost by sadness.

“Ah, sure.”

“You used to study here as well, right?”

“I… Um, yes. I finished high school here.” What was he supposed to say? It was clear that even if she knew his name, Melinda didn’t remember the things they had gone through together.

She just nodded.

“Do you mind if I seat?” She asked, pointing to his side.

“Um, no. No, of course not. Please take a seat.” He said, kind of choking the words out _. Please? Really, Phil?_

She didn’t mind his words and seated beside him.

“We have already met, right?” She asked, looking at him.

 _Oh, shit. Now what? What should I tell her?_ He just looked at her with his mouth slightly open. He was thinking of something to say, but nothing came out.

“At the park, remember? I’m Melinda May.” She started, and Phil let out a deep breath that he hadn’t noticed he was holding. “I shot you and your-”

“Daughter!” Phil said louder than he meant to. Finally a question he could answer. It wasn’t really a question, but he needed to show her he did remember and that they had indeed met. “Yes, I remember.” He finished, smiling at her.

She smiled back and nodded. _Oh God, she’s so beautiful._

A minute passed and Phil was beginning to panic. He didn’t know what to say to her. He never imagined she would follow him here. To be fair, he had completely abandoned the idea of talking to her today. And yet, here she is, seated right beside him.

“I saw you and Victoria talking…”

“You did? Did you hear it?” Okay, now he was indeed panicking.

“No!”

“Oh…”

“But I saw she was not giving you a good time.”

Phil didn’t know what to say. He just shrugged and looked back at the field.

“I don’t normally do this. But you seem like a nice guy, and you don’t come here often, so I wanted to apologize for her. Whatever the hell she told you…”

Wait, Melinda is apologizing for her friend? Was at this realization that Phil knew she cared for him. After all these years and all that happened, Melinda still cared for him. She felt empathy for just looking at him. She saw he wasn’t in a good place after his conversation with Victoria and she felt the need to make it better. Suddenly hope took over.

“It’s alright, you don’t need to apologize for her. I know how she can be.”

Okay, then, what she came here to do was done, now she could leave. Melinda smiled and nodded. Standing up, she took two steps.

_She is leaving, Phil… Say something. Come on._

 “How’s your project?”

“Huh?” Melinda said, turning back to him. Phil was now standing as well.

“Your project… Wasn’t that why you took a photo of us in the park?” He asked, rubbing the back of his head.

“Oh, right. It’s finished. That day was the last day I photographed for it.” She replied and kept looking at him.

“Oh, good!” Phil was just nodding his head, acknowledging what Melinda had just said and trying to think of something to say back.

Both didn’t move.

“I can show it to you…” She finally said, not recognizing herself. The words practically jumped out of her mouth.

Usually Melinda was really uptight about this part of her work. Victoria kept telling her she should sell her _art-sy_ pics, or expose them in someplace in the city but she never really cared about it. She said her art was for her, and for her only.

But now, now she was offering a stranger… No, not a stranger, a former colleague, she told herself to try and make it better in her mind. She was offering to show him her pics, just because.

“Oh… are you sure?” She caught him off guard and Phil didn’t know what to say for the tenth time.

“Yeah… If I remember well, your photo with…”

“Skye.”

“Skye. Your photo with Skye was one of my best. I would be happy to show it to you.”

Suddenly Melinda felt overwhelmed by the big smile that appeared on Phil’s face. The way his eyes got smaller and his nose wrinkled.

Phil had beautiful blue eyes that she had noticed when she was editing his photo, but now she realized his smile was almost as beautiful as his eyes. She thought he was quite adorable.

“I would love that.” Phil said, still smiling.

“Okay.” Melinda replied, already making her way out of the bleachers. “You have my card, don’t you?”

Phil thought about it. Yes, Skye had taken it. “Yes!”

“Good. Give me a call then.”

Phil just nodded. He was so dumbstruck by all of the things that had just happened. He went from hopeless to stunned, from sad to anxious, and finally, happy and full of hope.

Only Melinda could do that do him in a matter of hours.

“Bye, Coulson!” She said a little bit far already.

“Bye, May.” Phil replied with a wave of his hand.

He meant to tell her that for her it was just Phil, but she seemed pretty far already and he decided not to scream that, since he was pretty sure he had already made a fool of himself in the beginning of their conversation.

It didn’t matter. Nothing seemed to matter anymore.

After his conversation with Victoria, Phil felt his heart being crushed. But now, not only Melinda had come after him, but the reason she did that was because she thought he might be upset.

On top of all of that, she had just told him to call her. Which meant they would see each other another time.

Phil brushed both of his hands through his hair and face letting out a deep breath.

Phil knew what his past kept for him and God knows what the future might have in the store. But now he was damn sure he would enjoy the present.


	13. The Call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you who are following this story, I'm so sorry for the time it took me to update this time. Between uni and my writer's block it was difficult.
> 
> I admit this is a bit of a filler chapter... Anyway, if any of you have some input on the story for me, feel free to leave a comment! (I'll love you forever!)
> 
> Thanks for sticking with it. Enjoy (:

It had been two days since the reunion. Two days since Phil went from hopeless to hopeful. Also, two days that he stared at Melinda’s business card without having the courage to call her.

She had told him to call, why wouldn’t he? It was getting ridiculous. Soon, Melinda would completely forget about him again.

While Phil kept dwelling on his lifetime question, Melinda kept living in doubt as well.

All she could think of was about Phil. She tried to dig up some memories of her past, tried to rationalize why she felt such empathy towards him.

A knock on his bedroom door startled him.

“Hey, stranger…” His sister greeted.

“You know, sometimes it looks like you haven’t moved out at all.” Phil joked.

“Ha ha. Very funny. If you and my niece were here and I didn’t come often, mom would kill me.” She smiled and seated at his side on the bed.

“Just tell me you love me.” He hugged her.

“You know I do.” She settled in the embrace.

“So, what’s the deal?” She pointed to the card on his hand.

After all he had been through this couple of days back in the city, Phil realized his sister had become his confident. Every time the Melinda subject showed up, Louisa was always there to support him.

“I still didn’t have the courage to call.” He sighed.

“Why not? She told you to, didn’t she?”

“Yeah, but…”

“You are afraid she will remember.” It wasn’t a question. Louisa understood her brother’s concerns. The fear that Melinda could possibly remember their youth was still a big issue for him, mostly because he didn’t know how to approach it, he didn’t know if it was worth it.

“Victoria was right, you know? She will remember me eventually… And then what?”

“Then…” She took one of his hands on her own. “You will show her how much you loved her. How much you still do.”

He gave her a sad smile. _I do love her._

“Don’t you get it, Phil? You have a second chance with her. You can make things right. You just have to work on you approach.” She nudged him in the shoulder.

“I guess you can be right.”

“Come on... Mom said dinner’s ready.”

“Alright, just need to go the bathroom.” He said, tossing the card on his bed and making his way into his bathroom.

Louisa decided to wait for him on the bed. Looking at his bedroom, she let out a small chuckle realizing Phil didn’t change much of the room. Some of his Captain America posters were missing, but if she thought back on when they were teenagers, it was still the same.

She saw Melinda’s card near his pillow, where it landed when he tossed. Near his bed was his cellphone.

It was like a light bulb had just lit up atop her head. _Why not a little push?_

 

Phil came out of the bathroom not even five minutes later to find his sister holding his cell to his face, with a grin on hers.

“What-” He started to say but when his eyes darted to the device’s screen he just froze.

It was dialing a number he didn’t have saved on it. Taking a look at her left hand, he saw the card.

“Just pick it up…” She said before grabbing his hand and putting the cell on it.

 “What?” Phil couldn’t quite think right now. He knew what was happening, he could just hung up, but then what? His call would still be registered on Melinda’s phone. It was best to just face it.

“Good luck.” Louisa whispered with a grin before making her way out of his bedroom.

“Wait…” Too late, Louisa was already at the stairs.

Putting the device on his ear, he took a deep breath to try and calm his heart that seemed to be beating out of his chest.

 _Maybe she won’t even-_ “Hello!” Her voice sounded on the other end of the line.

“Uh…”

“Hello?”

“Uh, Hi! Melinda, it’s Phil!”


	14. The Episode

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it took me long to update, but life got in the way... SORRY!
> 
> I promise to update sooner next time. Enjoy (:

It was a cold night, typical of a night in the beginning of winter.

Melinda found herself alone in a long road. Looking down, her feet were bare and she could feel the cold and wet street beneath them. Hugging herself to try to warm her bare arms, she squinted her eyes, trying to see something in the middle of the thin fog that remained in the road.

The place was familiar but she felt lost. What was happening?

Turning around she saw two destroyed cars. One had crushed the side of the other and both were turned upside down.

She did recognized the place after all.

She choked on a sob that came out of her mouth. He eyes were full of the tears she was trying to hold back.

 _Why am I here? No… no, this is a nightmare. Wake up, Melinda._ She kept repeating to herself, brushing her hands up and down her arms as if trying to comfort herself, trying to get warm.

 _Wake up… wake up…_ She closed her eyes hard, feeling a tear fall down her cheek.

“Mommy?” She heard coming from her back.

Opening her eyes and turning, Melinda was faced with a small girl, her left cheek was covered in a trail of blood that seemed to originate from her forehead.

Melinda clasped her hands on her mouth, trying to hold the sob she could no longer hold inside. Tears began to fall again.

_No, no, no… not this._

“Mommy?” The girl repeated to one of the cars before looking at her. “You killed mommy…”

“No…” Melinda said with a broken voice. _Wake up!_

“You did.” The girl said with a tone of anger. “You killed my mommy…”

“No… It was an accident.” Melinda managed. “Here” she said, extending her hand towards the girl. “Let me help you…”

“No, you killed her…” The girl cried.

_Wake up… wake up…_

“I’m sorry… I’m so sorry. Let me help you.” Melinda said, trying to get closer to the girl. “Come with me, let me help you…”

“No, you are a monster. You killed mommy… you killed her and now -now there’s so much _pain_.”

_Wake up!_

“What? No… I’m only trying to help.”

“So much pain…” The girl cried. “Monster!”

_WAKE UP!_

 

She was startled out of her sleep. That is, if she could call that a sleep. It had been a while since she had one of those nightmares.

Between her photographing and the current talks with her therapist (that she considerably avoided for as long as she could), she had been doing good.

But now, now she looked at her watch that was located on her nightstand and saw that it marked 5:45 am. She had just gone to bed not long ago. _Wonderful._

One more night without sleep.

Putting a hand in her chest, she could feel her heart beating out of rhythm. Her forehead was damp with sweat, as well as her clothes and bed sheets.

A shower would have to do for now. The shower would wash away the thoughts she was always trying to avoid.

 

It was about 11:30 am when her doorbell rang, making Melinda snap out of her daze. She knew today was not going to be a productive day. After the nightmare, her mind hadn’t come to the right place yet.

She didn’t have many people that came to her house. To be honest, she didn’t have many people that even knew where she lived so the options to whom was ranging her doorbell right now were not many. Melinda just hoped it wasn’t her mother.

Opening the door, she let out a relieved sigh.

“We didn’t have any plans today, did we?” She asked in a low tone as Victoria made her way inside Melinda’s apartment.

“What? No…” Victoria said, putting some grocery bags on Melinda’s kitchen counter. “Why would you ask that?”

“Nothing. Thought I had plans with someone today…” Melinda said, seating at the place in the couch she had just left.

Turning to Melinda, Victoria started to notice the bags under her eyes. Melinda’s hair was still slightly damp from her earlier shower. She was wearing a pair of sweats that Victoria knew it might have been Andrew’s.

Analyzing the place around her, she noticed that the kitchen was in perfect state, not a thing out of place, which signaled that Melinda hadn’t been here for some time. She had quite a talent for leaving a mess behind.

“Did you eat today?” She asked, not turning to Melinda.

“Not hungry.” Melinda mumbled.

“No? Don’t you want to have brunch with me?” Victoria asked, turning to the sofa, realizing Melinda seemed broken. Broken like she hadn’t seen in a while.

Melinda ignored her question, not meeting her gaze.

Victoria made her way to the couch and seated beside her friend.

“Hey, what happened?”

Melinda seemed smaller than she actually was. She hugged a pillow from the couch before starting to talk.

“I had that nightmare again…”

“But the last time was-”

“Six months ago.”

“And why do you think it came back now? You were clear for a long time…” Melinda simply shook her head. She didn’t know why now. She didn’t know why her. She simply didn’t know.

Victoria felt for her friend now. Melinda was doing so good, she hadn’t had one of these in a long time… But suddenly her PTSD came crushing back at her and she seemed lost in herself, making Victoria remember the morning before the accident.

“Mel…” Melinda finally looked at her, eyes sore from clearly hours of crying.

“It’s over, okay?” Victoria reassured her.

Melinda nodded and let her friend embrace her.

She didn’t need much at these times, only someone who could be there for her, to give her the comfort she needed.

“Why don’t we go hiking? I know you like it, and once we are at the top of the hill we can just seat there…” Victoria offered. “Maybe you can teach me Tai Chi.”

Melinda actually snorted at that. “You know you suck.” She replied.

“Don’t hurt my feelings.” She said, getting up and walking towards her purse. “Come on, Mel… It’s going to be good for you.”

Melinda nodded. She knew staying at home would only make it worse, so why not?

As soon as she got up from the couch with the intention to go change, her cellphone started ringing somewhere.

“Aren’t you going to get it?” Victoria asked.

“I don’t even know where it is… I think it’s been ringing all morning but I didn’t want to look for it.” She said half way through her bedroom, leaving her friend behind with the mission of finding the device.

After tossing a few pillows around and looking between some books, Victoria finally found Melinda’s cell inside her purse that had been tossed aside her book shelf.

 _3 missed calls. One voice mail._ Read the screen.

Thinking about it, Melinda wouldn’t mind if Victoria checked it out, she hadn’t even bothered to answer the damn thing knowing it was ringing.

Clicking the calls, she didn’t recognized the number. It wasn’t saved under any name either.

Putting the phone on her ear to check the voice mail, he heart started to race.

 _“Hey, Melinda… It’s Phil –umm, Phil Coulson?! I’ve been here at the coffee shop for a while… Umm, and I was just wondering…”_ He sighed, a deep sigh Victoria could actually hear through the phone. _“You are not coming, are you? It’s okay. I just wanted to know if you are alright, if everything is alright…? Give me a call when you can?! No harm feelings. I hope nothing happened. Please call me.”_

Victoria sighed. Melinda did have plans after all.


	15. The Discussion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy (:

Melinda woke up in the next day surprisingly relaxed. The last night had been nothing like the previous one. No nightmares, no sweating, no nothing. Only sleep.

Although Melinda hated to admit, Victoria was always good at knowing just what she needed… what would make her feel better.

Getting out of bed, Melinda simply started her daily routine.

A glance at her calendar on the side of her fridge told her something she was not prepared to. It had been almost a month since she talked to her mother.

Not that Lian hadn’t called her in this one month, because she did. A lot. It just didn’t mean Melinda picked up.

So, one month since she called her mom. It couldn’t pass today.

After a light lunch, Melinda felt good enough to endure her task.

Picking up the phone, she went through her last calls. _Weird, an unsaved number._

The task to call her mother was completely forgotten as soon as she saw the strange number on the screen. She couldn’t remember who could possibly be. It could be a mistake, so why not just call it back and get over it?

She didn’t know. Melinda didn’t know why suddenly she was so afraid to call back.

_Think, Melinda… who could it be?_

“I know who it is but… Uuugh!” Deep down, she knew it was there in her brain, she just couldn’t get it out.

So much for a full day of no stress. Now her blood was boiling. Why was it so difficult to remember simple things? She felt completely frustrated about.

“Victoria!” Suddenly clicked in her mind.

Yeah, Victoria would help. _She was here yesterday when it rang, right?_ Although she didn’t say anything about it afterwards, she would help.

Dialing her friends name, Melinda only hoped she wasn’t making a big deal about it, but she couldn’t help it. The urge to seek her heart was stronger than ever.

“Mel? Is there a problem?”

“Yes!” Melinda blurted, cursing herself midway because now Victoria would demand to know what was happening.

“Yes? What is it? Do you want me to come over?”

“No!”

“Melinda, what’s going on?”

“Nothing. I just- I just need you to tell me something…”

“Okay…”

“Yesterday when you were here… When my phone started to ring. Did you get to answer it?”

“Uh, no…” That didn’t sound very convincing, not for Victoria.

She mentally cursed herself for that. Of course Melinda wasn’t going to buy it.

“Victoria! I’m asking for your help!” She could listen Melinda’s voice trembling.

“I’m being honest. I didn’t answer it, it stopped ringing by the time I found it.”

Melinda let out a sigh.

“Was there anything more than the missed calls?”

Shit, what was she supposed to answer now? _Yes, there was a message from Phil, asking why you stood him up. Better yet, almost crying about it._

“No… Uh, I don’t know. I don’t remember.”

“You don’t _remember_?” Melinda almost growled in the phone. Victoria was definitely hiding something.

“Why is this so important to you now?” Victoria finally asked in a nervous voice.

“I just want to know!” She replied. “And you are hiding something.”

“I’m not hiding anything. You shouldn’t be upset about it, you never cared if you missed a call.”

“I shouldn’t be- I AM upset! Because I’m not the person I was anymore. I AM upset because I lost a fucking phone call and something tells me it was important. So, thanks for helping, Victoria.”

And she hung up. All Victoria could hear at the other end of the line was the void she was left with. Melinda was hurt, on the verge of being aggressive, something she hadn’t seen since right after the accident when Melinda wasn’t coping yet with her new condition.

Victoria knew who it was but would it make any good to tell? _What if she gets worse?_

“Who was it?” Izzy, Victoria’s girlfriend asked as she leaned on the threshold of their bedroom.

“Melinda…” Victoria mumbled with her phone still in hand.

“What happened?”

“I think we just had a fight. She hung up on me.”

Izzy just chuckled making a _humpf_ sound she knew Victoria hated.

“Do you have something to say?” Victoria asked, following her girlfriend with her eyes.

“No.” She said as she entered the bathroom quickly making her way out again. “You know what? I do!” she said standing at the door.

Victoria just faced her with a not amused face.

“You have to stop controlling her life! She’s had enough of it. You can’t protect her from everything. You can’t keep pretending it’s better this way.”

“What do yo-”

“Let her live, Victoria!” Izzy said in a firm tone, interrupting Victoria mid-sentence.

Seeing her girlfriend without a response, Izzy realized she might have been a little bit harsh. Making her way to where Victoria was seated, she cradled Victoria’s face in her hand, leaned in and before she could kiss her, she said “I love you, but sometimes you are very controlling!” And then she left, leaving Victoria with just the sound of the bathroom door closing.

She had to give it to Izzy, she was being controlling, she had been ever since the accident but in her defense, she did it out of love.

She just failed to realize that love can also suffocate sometimes.

She knew Melinda wouldn’t pick up if she called right now. She needed space.

Grabbing her cell, she quickly taped a message and hit send before she would change her mind.

 

Melinda was making her way out of her kitchen with a mug of freshly brewed apple with cinnamon tea when she saw her cell vibrate and its screen lit up.

Taking a seat at her couch, she picked up the device to read the text.

_I’m sorry for the way I reacted. It was Phil! You should talk to him. I’m sorry! Love, V._

“Shit!”


	16. The Try

On the way to the house, she felt the nervousness building up inside of her. What was she supposed to say when the door opens?

After last night, when Melinda discovered Phil had been the person who called her, she remembered they had agreed to meet. Later, when Victoria and her spoke again – in better terms – Vic warned her about the voicemail.

_I’ve been here at the coffee shop for a while…_

Why she had to forget him?

_You are not coming, are you?_

No, she wasn’t coming… she wasn’t coming because her stupid memory failed her again.

_I just wanted to know if you are alright, if everything is alright…?_

As alright as things could be… yeah…

_Give me a call when you can. No harm feelings._

She decided not to call. It wouldn’t be right to explain all of this through the phone – that is if she had the courage to tell him about the accident.

Melinda had convinced Victoria to give Phil’s mom’s address to her. In fact, she had convinced Victoria to give her practically all the information about Phil being back. Or so she thought.

“Do you think I should have told her about the past?” Victoria had asked Izzy later, when she was in bed and just couldn’t get any sleep.

“No… You have to let them figure it out. Apparently he didn’t tell her either.” Izzy reassured her.

 

Melinda decided to walk to the house, it wasn’t very far from her place and she wasn’t driving much since the accident, just when she really needed to.

Thinking about it, she really wanted to buy a motorcycle. Before that night, she had been looking at some models, but now… Would it be right to buy one?

Sighing, she realized it would be just one more thing – out of the many - she would bring up to her therapist.

When she snapped out of her thoughts, she saw the big house in front of her. The feeling that she had already been there in some part of her past was strong in her heart. But this wouldn’t make any sense, if Phil was a part of her past, she would know. Wouldn’t she?

Shaking the feeling off, she approached the front door carrying an envelope on her right hand. She had promised him the pics of him and his daughter that day. It would be nice to apologize now, giving it to him as a gift.

She rang the doorbell and waited anxiously.

After she heard footsteps coming from inside, a teenager opened the door. The daughter… what was her name again?

“Hi.” The girl said. Melinda got the feeling she wanted to be sympathetic but at the same time, she must have known this was the woman who stood her dad up. The anger was clear on the girl’s face.

“Hello.” Melinda said, and for a minute, there was an awkward silence between them.

“I’m Melinda, I don’t know if you remember me.”

“Yeah, I know.”

_Of course she remembers you, she’s not the one with a brain injury._

“Is your dad home?”

“Umm, no. He is at his sister’s with grams.”

“Oh! I see…”

“Do you want to talk to him? I can call-”

“No! No… You don’t need to worry. I just came to give you two these…” She said, handling the envelope to Skye. “I promised him, but I couldn’t meet him before.”

She could notice Skye’s face changing suddenly, she didn’t have that frown between her brows anymore, instead she was just listening to what Melinda was saying.

“Um, thanks.” Was the only thing she managed to say.

Inside Skye’s mind, she was battling on the facts in front of her. She knew about Melinda’s accident. She knew that, that day in the park her dad told her Melinda would not remember him.

A flash came to her mind of Phil entering the house with a look of sadness after he was supposed to meet Melinda.

She had tried to make him speak the day before, but he just wouldn’t give it in.

“Forget it, Skye.” He said in a firm tone, almost annoyed when she kept asking. After that answer, she decided to just stop asking. Her father was hurting and all she could do for him was be supportive.

Now, she realized that the ‘date’ never happened. If Melinda was here to hand the said photos, it meant they never met at the coffee shop.

 _She is here trying to apologize…_ Or at least she was here, because while Skye was lost in her thoughts, she heard Melinda mumbling a “I gotta go.”

That’s when she realized the woman was already heading back to the street and walking away.

What was she supposed to do now? Her dad wasn’t here to make things right with Melinda, and the woman was slipping away.

Skye hurried back in the house throwing the envelope on the sofa, she made quick work putting her boots on before grabbing her coat on the hanger and running after Melinda.

“Wait!” She screamed, realizing how fast the woman was. How could she be so tiny and so fast?

“Melinda? Wait!”

The older woman stooped as soon as she heard her name being screamed. _What now?_

“Hey…” The girl said in a shallow breath. “Wow… You are… fast.” Skye said with a hand on her chest, trying to calm her breathing.

“Do you mind if I walk with you? I was just going to my auntie’s anyway…”

“No… sure.” Melinda replied a little bit indecisive if that would be a good idea.

Skye just smiled back at her, put her hands inside her pockets and started walking alongside Melinda.

In her mind, Skye was not sure if this had been a good idea, she just wanted to get to know Melinda better, maybe she could help her dad with it.

The silence was awkward at first, Skye’s mind was rushing a million times, trying to sort out what she was going to say to the stoic woman beside her.

Melinda wasn’t an easy woman to approach but Skye couldn’t just let the opportunity get away. Who was this woman that had such an impact on her dad?

“So... how long have you been photographing?”

It was a simple question that she didn’t even know she would be interested in the answer. Hell, she didn’t even know if Melinda would respond, but for now It would have to do. For now, it would the golden question, the one that would lead her to break the ice on the woman.


	17. The Apology

Melinda exited the shower with the sound of her cellphone ringing, wrapping the towel around her body, she slipped on the floor of her bedroom before reaching the device on her nightstand.

“Hello?”

“Um, Melinda?”

_Phil…_

“Yes.”

“It’s Phil... Phil Coulson?”

“I know… I recognize your voice.” She wanted to smile while saying that, but decided to hold back. She didn’t know if Phil was calling to simply yell at her or anything.

“Ah! Sure, that’s good!”

Awkward silence.

“So, um… Skye told me you came here, and um, I got the photos. Thanks for that! You didn’t have to…”

“It was the least I could do, Phil.”

“They are really pretty. Thank you!”

_Nice, aren’t we going to talk about the fact I stood you up?_

“You are welcome. They really helped with my project.”

“Good. I’m glad!”

“Phil, I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to-”

“No, it’s alright…”

“It’s not. I didn’t want to leave you there… I couldn’t, I- I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. I get it… I hope you are alright?!”

She smiled at that. He had everything to be angry at her but instead he was being calm and supportive. She didn’t even give him a real motive about not showing up… Could she do it?

“ _Go ahead… ask her… Go on, before she hangs up.”_

Melinda could hear another voice coming from Phil’s side. Was that his daughter?

“Umm… Melinda?”

“Yes?”

“Would you… Um, would you like to, I don’t know…”

“ _Dad, just ask! You are babbling_.”

“Phil?”

“Yeah?”

“Would you like to meet me at _The Playground_ tonight?”

“P- Playground?”

“Yes, you know, that bar near the school…? That way I can buy you a drink to apologize.”

“Oh, Um… No! I mean, no you don’t need to apologize…”

“Oh?”

_Damn Phil…_

“You don’t need to apologize, but I would like to buy you a drink, if you want to…”

She smiled at that… Good, he wasn’t angry.

“Meet you at 8?”

“Sure! Eight is fine. Do you want me to pick you up?”

“No, no need. I’ll meet you there!”

“Alright!”

“Good, then. See you there.”

Phil couldn’t believe what had just happened. In a moment he was nervous on the phone with Skye hanging at his shoulder trying to hear his conversation, and at another moment, Melinda was asking him on a date. Or it wasn’t a date? Was he already overthinking it?

“Oooh my God, dad!”

“What?”

“She asked you out? She beat you to the punch?” Skye was laughing, rolling on top of his bed.

“Hey, I was going to…”

“DAD! You are so cute!” Skye said, now squeezing his cheeks.

“Yeah, yeah, very funny. When I get rid of Louisa, I have you to bother me…”

“Enough of that. We need to get you some clothes…” She said, dragging him by the arm inside his closet.

 

Of course when Phil arrived, Melinda was already there. Seated at the bar with flawless hair hanging at her back – he loved her hair – she was wearing simple jeans with a bordeaux blouse and he could see her leather black jacket hanging at the stool she was seated. She looked a vision even in simple clothes.

He made his way through the crowd not letting his eyes off of her for one minute.

When he got to her, it seemed like she haven’t seen him yet so he reached for her before bringing his hand down. Maybe it wasn’t right to touch her when they haven’t even begun the night.

“Excuse me, is this seat taken?” He wanted to be funny.

She turned to him with a frown on her face and as soon as he saw it he knew maybe it wasn’t the right line. _Nice, Phil… you are not funny._

“Oh, Phil!” But then it was worth it. He saw the frown between her eyebrows fading, being replaced by a shy smile on her lips. Yep, definitely worth it.

“Hi!” He smiled back, standing on her side.

“Hi!”

They didn’t kiss, nor hugged. One didn’t reach for the other, it was much like a dance where both still didn’t know what the rules were.

“Wow, you came…” He said, scratching the back of his head before taking a seat right beside her.

She looked at her hands and chuckled. _I guess I deserve it._

“I’m sorry.”

“No!” he said, raising his hand. “I don’t want you to apologize anymore… it’s fine!” He smiled again, trying to reassure her.

“I know, but it wasn’t right not to show up. And you called and I-”

“Melinda” He said, putting his hand on top of hers. She looked at it, unable to have a reaction. “I trust you had a motive…?”

She nodded.

“And a big one?”

She nodded again.

“Then you are forgiven.”

She smiled.

At that, they settled. One didn’t know what to say to the other.

“So, can I buy you a drink?” He finally asked.

“That was my line.” She said, not looking at him.

He laughed. Of course it was. “A beer?”

She nodded, and with that, their night begun.

 

They talked about a lot of things, except Melinda’s motive for not showing up. She tried to bring it up a few times in her head, but it was easily dismissed when Phil brought up another subject that led Melinda to a completely different line of thought.

She caught herself wondering a lot of times how this man could do this. He made Melinda forget all about her problems. When he was not talking about some of his passions or his daughter, he was looking completely adorable – something Melinda realized while he spilled the rest of his beer on the table. She ordered another one seconds after, helping him dry out the table with some napkins.

He made her laugh a few times, another thing Melinda was not used to do a lot.

When they realized the songs that have been playing stopped, both laughed and decided that it was maybe time to leave.

The night had been good so far, Phil was relieved about the fact that there was no awkward moments at all.

Melinda was still wondering how that have been possible.

They decided to walk home since both had been drinking and the night had a light breeze.

“It’s been a long time since I had a night like this…” Melinda eventually said, breaking the silence that had settled upon them a few minutes ago.

“Why?” As soon as the word left his mouth, he regretted a little. Maybe it wasn’t the right time to push.

He could see a sad line spreading on her face.

“Life happened. I just don’t go out much.”

He nodded.

“What about you?” She asked. He wasn’t expecting her to continue on the subject and that might have been spread all over his face.

“I, um… me too. I don’t go out much.”

This time, she nodded.

After a few minutes, they arrived in front of her building.

“So, we are here.” He said.

Forget what they both thought at the beginning of the night, the awkward moment was now.

“Thanks for walking me home. You didn’t have to.”

“I know.” He smiled “But I wanted to.”

_What was that supposed to mean, Phil?_

“Thanks again.” This time she smiled, and leaned in to kiss his cheek.

Phil was caught up in the moment, he didn’t know what to do with his hands. The moment her mouth touched his left cheek, his hand settle on her forearm and they stopped.

It was the second time he touched her tonight and still felt like sparkles were running through his whole body.

To touch her again after all this time…

Thinking about all of it, caught up in the moment, Phil closed his eyes, letting himself enjoy it. Eyes closed, he could smell her hair in the seconds she was close.

That’s why he didn’t realized how caught up in all of this he was. When Melinda put some distance between them, she looked up and saw his eyes closed.

_Who would do that?_

Again, in a matter of seconds, when Phil was about to open his eyes, he felt soft lips on his and closed it again. She was kissing him. Melinda May was kissing him.

The hand that was on her arm before slowly made the way to her waist. The other one cradled her face and she let him guide her closer.

The kiss lasted a couple of minutes and when they parted, no words were spoken.

He looked in her eyes expecting to see the same joy he was feeling. Instead, he saw something else.

“I- I’m sorry!” She said, already getting out of his embrace.

He tried to reach out for her again but when his thumb brushed her arm and she flinched, he retreated, seeing that maybe it wasn’t the right move.

“Melinda, wait…”

“No, Phil. This shouldn’t have-”

_…happened! This shouldn’t have happened._

He just stood there, watching while she made her way inside the building.

After he opened his eyes, all Phil could see was fear on hers. For her, it felt like a mistake. For him, it felt like the world have given him a second chance.

Making his way home, all he could think was that Melinda had reached for him. She started the kiss, she kissed him first.

And that had to mean something.


	18. The Sentimentalism

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for taking too long to update. This chapter is a bit longer to apologise and make up for the waiting! 
> 
> I hope you'all enjoy (:

Sipping from his coffee in the early morning, Phil kept replaying the kiss in his head.

It would have been heaven on earth to him if it wasn’t for Melinda’s response afterwards.

She ran away. She thought it was a mistake. He had to change that.

 

Melinda opened her eyes, and the first thought that came into her mind was the same thing.

_I kissed him. Why did I kiss him?_

Deciding a shower should wash away all of her problems, Melinda decided to get up and do just that.

By the end of the day, she should forget all about it, like she always did.

That’s what she tried to convince herself about it.

 

Meanwhile, at his house Phil made a decision.

It had taken him long enough to get where he was, and he was not throwing it away.

Melinda would try to put a distance between them, but he couldn’t let her do this. He wouldn’t let her do this.

He showered and dressed in record time. Making his way downstairs, he only had time to give his mom a quick kiss on the cheek before heading out, listening to a fading “Where are you going?” from Julie on his way out.

He didn’t have the time to explain though, just letting her know that he would be back soon.

 

Melinda was sorting through some of the first photos she took for her project when there was a knock on her door.

Making her way to the door, her eyes widened when she saw the man standing on the other way.

“Can we talk?” He said with a look of pleading in his eyes.

“Phil?”

“Please Melinda, can we talk?”

“I-I don’t think it’s necessary. It was a mis-”

“Please don’t tell me it was a mistake. It certainly didn’t feel like a mistake.” He said, realizing his voice had gotten a little bit louder. But what the hell, he couldn’t lose her again. He certainly would not let her go easily.

It was good that he let his emotions get the better of him because soon, Melinda was nodding her head, looking to the ground and stepping aside, motioning him to her living room.

Phil didn’t quite know what was about to happen right now. His heart was racing and his mind was as well. Throughout his life, Phil could count on his fingers the amount of times he acted out of an impulse.

“Can I get you something to drink?” She asked.

“Um, no. Thank you. I just came here to talk.”

She nodded, crossing her arms in her chest and leaning on the closed door. She kept watching the man that stood in her living room.

“Please, take a seat.”

He nodded and did. Looking at his hands, Phil started to think what he could say now.

“You didn’t came here expecting me to do all the talking, did you?”

“No… I… I just-” He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and continued, “I wanted to talk about the kiss. Our kiss.”

He could hear Melinda taking a deep breath as well.

“Look, Phil. Don’t take this the wrong way but… It was a mistake.”

“Please don’t say that.” He closed his eyes again.

Melinda couldn’t understand why this was making him so upset.

“It was not right. I acted out of an impulse and don’t even know why.”

“You can’t say it didn’t mean anything to you…”

“How would you know?” This time, she was the one raising her voice a little bit.

His eyes snapped open and he looked at a confused Melinda.

He got up and started to walk towards her very slowly. Letting her have the chance to move.

When she didn’t, he continued walking until they were centimeters apart.

“Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t want to make you mad.”

“Why do you care?” She said, searching for an answer in his eyes.

All she saw was confuse, exactly like her.

“I like you! I liked our kiss.” He decided to keep it simple. He could not imagine how Melinda would react if she found out about their past now. He could not take this chance. He had to build something with her first.

“Look, we kissed. Or I kissed you, but again, it was a mistake. I made a mistake. It doesn’t matter anymore. I’m not the right person to carry on with relationships. I’m not right for this.” This time she did get out of his presence. She walked towards her couch and took a seat far from where he stood near the door.

“You shouldn’t say that…” He whispered.

“And why do you care so much?” She raised her voice again. “Huh, Phil? It was one kiss and suddenly we are having a sentimental conversation.” She leaned forward and put her head in her hands. “I don’t even know why I got so close to you. I never do. I never did… not since…” _The accident_. She stopped and Phil gulped.

Silence.

“Do you want me to leave?” He didn’t want to, but he also didn’t want to upset her. He could see she was vulnerable and at the back of his mind, he could think of Victoria slapping him in the face for making Melinda face such a situation.

A “No.” came from her and suddenly all of his fear of Victoria was replaced by hope.

“I need to ask you something… So I can try to understand all of this.” She said, still looking to the ground.

“Okay.” He said, taking a seat in front of her.

“Did we know each other already? I mean, I know we went to high school together, but…” And there it was. The question came crushing him like a truck. What was he supposed to say now? He didn’t want to lie but also didn’t want to tell her he whole truth.

Realizing she was now looking at him, searching for an honest answer, he just nodded.

“So it is true… we knew each other?” Another nod from him.

“I wasn’t dreaming…” She whispered to herself.

_She dreamed about me…_

“What were we?”

_Come on, Phil, tell her…_

“F-friends.” _Wrong answer_ “We were just friends.” _Best friends. Lovers. You were the love of my life._

A few more moments of silence.

“It doesn’t matter.” She said. He didn’t know if she was informing him, or if she was trying to convince herself. “I can’t do this. I’m not the same person you knew back then. Things changed.”

“I know…” came out of his mouth before he could stop, and again, he cursed himself for letting his emotions get the better of him.

“You do?”

He nodded. “I… Victoria told me about the- about the accident.”

She nodded. “Good, so now you know why…” She got up and walked to the door. “Now you can go!”

“Wait, Mel…” He said, getting up and reaching for her. She winced a little when his hands came in contact with her arms, but in a matter of seconds she relaxed and let him come behind her. “I know what happened. And I believe the Melinda I met is still in there somewhere. We just need to find her, feed her.” He said, realizing how she had let him embrace her so quickly. _Good, she trusts me._

“I’m not the same person…” She whispered in a mixture of being angry and sad.

“Even if you are not… I’m willing to get to know this new Melinda.” He said, turning her in his arms.

The height difference screamed when they were in this position.

Melinda let her forehead rest in his chest and all Phil could think about was how good it was to have her in his arms again.

“Please give me a chance. The things that happened in the last couple of days show that we are not something to let go easily.”

Melinda let him speak. She liked hearing his voice and all of his words made sense to her. His words made sense in her head and in her heart.

“What if you don’t like the new Melinda?” She whispered.

“I think it’s impossible.” He said, this time, running a hand through her hair.

It made her chuckle. He was a sap and this brought a warm feeling to her chest, like she had already known this side of him.

She didn’t move out of his embrace, neither she said anything after his speech.

The fact that she was calm in his arms spoke millions to both of them and Phil decided to take this moment to seal the deal between them.

He would take care of her. He would give them both this second chance. Even if it was meant to find out that Melinda had got over him. He couldn’t live with this doubt anymore.

The hand that was in her hair soon made the way to the side of her face, finding her chin.

He gently pulled her chin up so he could look at her face.

Her eyes were already closed, expecting something. Trusting him completely.

He lowered his face to hers, looking intently at her to give her the option to pull away until the last minute.

She didn’t. And he kissed her. He could feel she kissing him back, and what he could not believe happened.

This kiss was better than the last one.


	19. The Swimming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, sorry for taking so long to update... ):
> 
> Shorter chapter, but I hope you'll like it.

_“Come on, Phil… Don’t be such a pus-”_

_“Hey! Watch it!” He said, following her into a dark path that they both knew well were it was going to end up. “Come on, Mel, let’s go home. This is not a good idea.”_

_Melinda didn’t even look behind, she just kept going._

_“Melinda, I promised your mother that I would bring you back…”_

_“Would you stop?” She said, actually stopping on her tracks to look him in the eye. “We are just going to take a swim. Everybody does it. You used to enjoy it.”_

_“I did! But that was when we were young and stupid, now we have to be more responsible.”_

_“Phil, not even you believe in what you’re saying.” She said, walking again._

_After a few minutes, they entered the high school building were the pool was. Phil took a deep breath and followed Melinda to the other side._

_“Come on, it’s going to be fun.” She said, approaching him with a teasing grin._

_“We should go back.” He tried to convince her. It didn’t work because as soon as the words were out of his mouth, Melinda was taking of her shirt and working on the buttons of her denim pants._

_Despite being afraid, Phil was very keen to swimming at their high school pool. With Melinda. Naked._

_Everybody did it actually. For a long time, all the students knew a way to get inside the building and take a swim, it was practically a habit for all of them._

_Phil tried to convince himself that he liked doing it, that he enjoyed to break the rules when in fact, the first time he did it was because Garret had dragged him along clamming that a party they could not miss was going on – it was in fact, but Phil couldn’t care less about it._

_Now, he only did it because of Melinda. And to be honest, Melinda was a much better companion than Garret._

_He was pulled out of his thoughts and fears as soon as he heard the splash of water coming prom the pool. He followed the track of clothes on the ground until he found Melinda emerging for air, glowing (he just didn’t know if was from the water or the love he felt for her)._

_“You have one minute to take off your clothes and join me.” She said in a firm tone._

_“Yes, ma'am!” He said, grinning. How was he supposed to say no to that?_

_Screw the fears, he thought as he managed with shaking fingers to take off the last of his clothing._

 

“Phil? Are you listening?” The reason of his thoughts brought him back to the present.

“Yeah, sorry.”

“Where were you?” Melinda asked as she returned her attention to her laptop.

“High school.” Phil said, kissing the side of her forehead.

“What?”

He chuckled and got up from the couch to take their plates to the sink. “Nothing.”

Melinda kept looking at him, trying to be intimidating.

“So, you were saying…” He said taking a seat on the spot he had occupied before, putting an arm around her a pulling her closer to him.

She decided to let it go for now and returned her attention to the photos she was reviewing on her laptop.

“Victoria keeps telling me I should expose them in an art gallery.”

“You should!”

The silence settled between them and Phil could see the apprehensive look on Melinda’s face.

“What’s wrong?”

“I don’t know if I should…”

“Why not? They are beautiful. You were always a great photographer.”

At that, Melinda stared at his face. Had he known this side of her already?

She saw the frown between his browns after he said that, almost as he had regretted it.

_Never mind._

“I feel like this is private. A safe place for me.”

He nodded. He really did understood, all he wanted was this, Melinda feeling safe.

“Then don’t do it.”

This time she actually chuckled and shot him a questioning glance.

“I just think you shouldn’t push yourself to do things just because people say it’s going to be good for you…”

The questioning glance was still there, this time as if asking _really, and what about us?_

He let out a sigh. “I know what you are thinking… I just want the best for you, I’ll always let you choose.”

Now she smiled and leaned into him. “Thank you.”

Phil just kissed her forehead and took a deep breath. He knew that attempting a new relationship with Melinda became more dangerous everyday, but what was he supposed to do?

When you really love somebody you have to fight for them everyday.

Phil just hoped that Melinda understood that and didn’t come to hate him if she ever find the truth.

Deciding he would not let this kind of thoughts cloud his judgment and ruin everything he’s been working on for them both, Phil just said “You know what we should do?”

“Hmm?” Melinda asked, again not looking up from her computer.

“We should go swimming…”

“Swimming? Where?”

He smiled at her, suddenly full of hope. “I’ll find somewhere.”

Melinda just nodded and at that, Phil felt himself full of joy. Melinda was accepting him in her life more and more everyday, and at these moments he couldn’t care about the past, just hope that the future would bring them both the happiness they deserve.

_Now, I just have to remember how to pick a lock…_


	20. The Dinner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe that this fic has reached it's 20th chapter. We are reaching the end of it, so please stick with it (:
> 
> THANKS SO MUCH to all of you who've been reading it and giving me feedback about it, YOU ALL ROCK! 
> 
> Also, thanks to my amazing beta http://wllgardners.tumblr.com/ for joining me on this crazy ride that has been to try and write something good each chapter. <3

So, a week had passed since Phil convinced Melinda that they would be good together and that included dinners, walks on the park and many other sweet dates he put together to make her happy.

Today had been finally the day they had dinner with the family, Phil’s family. When he picked her up at her house and drove them to Louisa’s place, he could notice Melinda was fidgeting.

“Hey” he said, putting his right hand on top of her left thigh to comfort her. “Do you want to cancel it?”

“No.” She said, covering his hand with hers.

“Okay.” He squeezed it gently. “Everything is fine.”

She nodded and smiled a little.

 

The night was better than all of them had expected. That is because all of them had reasons to be nervous. Louisa, Julie and Phil were all trying not to alarm Melinda in any way that would make her feel like this wasn’t right. Melinda was trying to be normal in her way, not wanting to disappoint anybody, and actually giving a shot at her own happiness.

Skye, was the only one that seemed not at all worried about it. She was the most chatty one, cracking jokes about her dad and trying to make Melinda feel welcome.

 

After dinner, Phil and Melinda seated at Louisa’s back porch to enjoy the night and breath some fresh air while the other three women sat inside talking about their days and actually giving the couple some space.

“What are you thinking?” Melinda asked Phil. It was an unusual question for her but after seen his contemplative look, she couldn’t leave it behind.

“I’m just glad the night went well.” He smiled, moving a hand through her hair and smiling at her.

After a quick peck on her lips, he asked “Do you want some wine?”

Melinda just nodded as Phil got up and went inside to bring them the drink.

 

Skye was walking to the bathroom when she saw Melinda by herself. With a quick look around, she didn’t see her dad which gave her more than a motive to work up some courage and go talk to Melinda.

“Hey!” She said, passing through the glass door.

“Hi.” Melinda seemed a bit startled by the girl but managed to look polite.

“I’m sorry if I scared you. Wasn’t my intention.”

“It’s ok.” Melinda reassured. “Do you want to seat?”

“Umm, sure.” She said, walking to the chair her dad was before. “Where’s dad?”

“Inside. He said he was getting some wine.”

“Ah! Aunt Louisa better not find him going through her collection.” She joked.

“Should we go get him?” Melinda asked, not really sure what was happening.

Skye just laughed and shook her head no as if saying _let them sort it out_.

They sat in silence for a while. Both not sure of what they could say.

“Did you like it?” Skye, as usual, broke the silence.

“Um?”

“The dinner… did you like it? I mean, not the food- well, the food as well, but… us. Did you like being here? With us?”

_She babbles like her dad._

Skye tucked her hands between her legs while she rocked her body back and fourth waiting for Melinda to answer. _Nice, Skye. Now she will think this is an interrogation_.

Melinda smiled at her before replying, “I loved it. I felt really comfortable with all of you.”

“Really?” Skye asked with a smile on her face. “Good. I’m glad.”

Melinda just nodded and managed a smile as well.

“Can I ask you something?” Melinda said, and at the same moment she could see Skye was thrilled by the move that she was actually trying to bond.

Skye just nodded and waited.

“I heard your grandmother calling you _Daisy_ sometimes… But I know you as Skye.”

Her smile was gone now and Melinda was sort of regretting bringing up this subject.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. I just got confused and-”

“It’s ok.”

Melinda nodded.

“When I was adopted, I had a name for myself… _Skye_. I always liked it, I chose it because no matter what happened to me throughout the day, looking at the sky at night really brought me peace. The E at the end was just a nice touch to it. Anyway, when Phil and Audrey adopted me, they knew I really liked the name but Audrey wanted something more… formal, I guess. So they named me Daisy, said it was her favorite flower. Grandmother’s too. I liked it. I continued to introduce myself as Skye because for some reason I liked that only family would get to call me Daisy.”

Sometimes Skye couldn’t believe herself when she said the word family. The sense that she really had one now was still something astounding to her.

“But umm, when she- when she died… Both dad and I were trying to cope, so I thought why not start with small, daily things… And I decided to ask him to call me Skye again, you know… to sort of pay a respect to mom. She took such a pleasure choosing the name Daisy, so I didn’t want it to be used in vain anymore. I wanted to be something that it was only hers. Dad understood although he still calls me Daisy from time to time. Grandma as well. I don’t mind, but I prefer Skye. It doesn’t get so emotional to me. It’s not that I’m trying to wipe her out, you know? It’s just that…”

“It’s your way of coping!” Melinda said in a low, calm tone.

“Yes.”

After that, both of them sat in silence glad that they understood each other.

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback is welcome.


End file.
